Tried everything. With number 1, I couldn't sleep in the same room with him, because I would hear every squeak and sigh that he made. Even hearing him on the monitor would wake me up instantly. My mother would sleep on the guest bed in the same room with him and come over with him when it was time to feed him at night. It worked at that time as my husband was almost always out of town during that time. I would switch on the monitor only on those nights when he was home. We did this for three months, then we moved his cot into our room from 3-6 months when we discovered that the wallpaper in his room in our rental apartment was moldy and we couldn't get it cleaned. By then, he was less noisy and I think I was also less nervous.
With number 2, I moved into the guest bed in the same room as he was far less noisy. I stayed with him there for 6 months. My poor husband really missed me, but I was really anxious with number 2 because of his reflux, so sometimes, I would need to clean up after him after he spit up.
With number 3, we have the crib next to my side of the bed in our room. He's been pretty good, waking only twice in the middle of the night and again in the morning when my husband gets ready for work, so it hasn't been too bad.