When do you have visitors in your house for new born visit?

C

claresaunders

Registered User
Hi all,
I have friends and relatives coming after the baby is born in November. Some visitors will have little kids with them and they might stay with us for a week or so (age < 5).
Do you think it's okay for little kids to hold our 4 weeks old baby? I've heard it's better not have little kids around as new borns are not very good with germs etc...

Thanks
Clare
 
Well, I had a toddler in the house from the day my newborn came home because he was her brother. And he was prone to colds (until I discovered the wonders of seven seas multivitamin) and she did catch one from him (or the general winter during which she was born) plus she had extremely small nasal passages and took ages to get over it (by which I mean around a month). But even when he had a cold I never stopped him from touching her or kissing her because he was only 14 months when she was born and I just wanted to let him love her. Being my son, I didn't have to option of saying no.

I would actually say no to visitors when my baby is that young, unless they are super close friends/family, not so much for the baby but because as a new mum it is just exhausting (4 weeks is around when colic hits for many babies) and you just need to be around people you don't need to act nice around. You will probably be too exhausted to have much fun with your visitors anyway. It's always tricky saying no to people - and saying no on the grounds of germs will definitely not go down well - but you might try asking them to delay their visit so you can enjoy their company when you are not so exhausted. If they have had kids themselves, they should understand.
 
For young kids and close close contact, if possible I think it's best to wait until after the 2 month immunisations at least. Babies are at greater risk for catching infectious diseases, and IF they catch something, they could have more serious complications. Of course with siblings it is impossible to separate them, but with cousins/friends, I would discourage kisses etc.
 
Thanks a lot ladies. It's indeed very difficult to say no to visitors especially they are excited and looking forward to come for the visit...My little one is due in Mid November and they are coming just a bit after Xmas...i guess i will have to make sure no kisses and wash hands before holding the baby etc...
I dont want to be freaked out too much and stress about it...if i can't avoid it, i will just make sure i take extra care and i think they are only going to be here for one week max...let's see...
 
Don't newborns have built in immunity from their mothers for a few months after birth? These are prolonged with breastfeeding. We had my wife's parents staying with us, my parents came soon after... extra hands can even be useful.

As charade said, plenty of babies grow up with older brothers and sisters around them and playing with them all the time. Seems like being sensible but not worrying is the best option.
 
2010-NewDad said:
Don't newborns have built in immunity from their mothers for a few months after birth? These are prolonged with breastfeeding. We had my wife's parents staying with us, my parents came soon after... extra hands can even be useful.

As charade said, plenty of babies grow up with older brothers and sisters around them and playing with them all the time. Seems like being sensible but not worrying is the best option.
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Extra hands can be useful but only if they are there to help. If they are there to be guests, then it's just extra people and noise waking up a baby you have just put to sleep. I have had both kinds, my mum came to help and did, my in-laws came to visit and didn't.

The legendary immunity conferred by breastfeeding didn't prevent my daughter from catching a cold, even as it was cited to me repeatedly. I have become very suspicious about all these benefits.

That said, I'm not saying she shouldn't have to guests because of the germs. But after my first baby, I knew better than to have guests (distinguished from family that comes for the purpose of helping) for at least a couple of months after giving birth. One of my closest friends did visit, with no promise of helping, but just for a couple of days. It worked out great - we stayed up chatting one entire night and I breastfed through it.
 
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I don't prefer anyone to visit us for really long lengths of time (days at a time) until my children are at least 8-12 weeks old. Even family.

After our most recent birth friends did come to visit--in the hospital and at home but they called ahead to make sure I was up for it and would spend a few hours in the afternoon or evening and then go home. Even my in-laws didn't just show up for days at a time to spend time with us and the baby.

My then 3-year-old son was allowed to hold and touch the baby but only if he was feeling well and he had washed his hands and didn't touch her face or hands.

We brought my daughter to my workplace (I work around small children) when she was about 8-weeks-old and I returned to work. The children were not allowed to touch my daughter at first. When she was about 3-4-months-old I would allow them to touch her but only her feet (they're all curious to touch a baby) and afterward we would wash her feet. My daughter never fell ill until she was about 1-year-old.

I think that children should not be allowed to touch or hold a baby until the baby is at least 8-weeks-old unless the baby happens to be a sibling. I would personally feel uncomfortable hosting guests (even close friends or family) only 4 weeks after my baby's birth and I would not be okay with having small children in a cramped home with me with my baby at that young age.
 
We had friends visiting us from day one, but only for a couple of hours, and mostly on weekends. But again as thanks mentioned, everyone called up before coming to fix up a time suitable for us. Yes, the first 4-6 weeks are really exhausting for the new mother, and you cannot have so much with friends at that time.
As we always knew beforehand when someone was coming, we would put our daughter to sleep in the pram or basket, and bring the pram into the living room for everyone to see tha baby. And initially, she used to sleep all day and be awake all night, so there was no point anyone would hold her or play with her as she was sleeping soundly that time.
I think it's great if you can have a basket for the baby, and let everyone see from around. No need for anyone to pick up the baby or touch the baby.
 
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