The Contented Little Baby Book by Gina Ford

S

sunrays

Registered User
I have been hearing a lot about this book and although the routines given are said to be very (maybe too) strict, it is said to work.

Has anyone used this? Please share your experiences. I've a while to go until baby arrives but am eager to learn if there are any methods that help baby (and me!) to sleep through the night faster.

:baby:
 
If you want to breastfeed please be aware that many of the ideas in this book will hinder you rather than help you. Don?t be fooled by the lip service she pays to believing that breast is best. Many of the suggestions in the book go against getting breastfeeding off to a good start.

Most new mothers begin to feel confident about their new role as a mother around the four to six week mark. I would wait until you know that breastfeeding is working and that you and baby both have no worries about it before even thinking about a routine.

By four to six weeks you and your baby will be in a rhythm ? dancing around together. And most mothers find that the style of their live becomes somewhat predictable (as much as anyone?s can).

Mothers who use Gina Ford?s ideas give the credit to Gina Ford when in fact they should be giving the credit to themselves because they are the ones who achieved the happy rhythm they have with the their babies.

Remember that night feeds are very important to maintain your milk supply when you are breastfeeding. It isn?t such a good idea to try and get rid of them. Rather to manage the night feeds by lying down so that you can still get rest while doing them.

Barb
 
Hi I used this routine and loved it. Must add that I am bottle feeding and did not adhere to the rules as strictly as Gina says (dictates :) however using the feeding and sleeping times have made our life so much easier. Our daughter is 7 months, eats well, very healthy and happy and sleeps from 7-7 solidly and has for a couple of months now. I highly recommend this routine, taken lightly though, don't let it stress you as it easily can. FYI: my daughter needed slightly longer nap times than Gina suggests for the first 5 months or so.
PS It may seem hard to wake your baby during naps, but at the next nap time both of you will be glad you stuck to the routine and times as sleeping and settling is easier then
 
We used it and highly recommend it! A word of warning though ...

Do not try it until your milk comes in and you are confident with the breast feeding. Breast feeding is not as easy as it looks and it's important you get this sorted first. If you're stressing about getting into a routine then your milk flow could suffer. Gina encourages a lot of pumping in the early months too - this is hard but well worth it.

The routines are strict but you get used to it. The older your baby gets the easier it is to juggle the timings a bit. It's very important to realise that there will be days when it doesn't work and you shouldn't beat yourself up about it. A lot of Mum's fall into this trap and wind up feeling hopeless because the book kind of makes you feel that way. Just persist and you will be fine.

I know a lot of people who use these routines and we all have happy contented babies who get plenty of food and plenty of sleep. It has been great for us in planning our day and our son slept through the night by 11 weeks (some babies manage even earlier). If you decide to do it then you should also try to track down other Mum's who follow it - it's a great way to get advice and support.

Anyway, we think it's great! I had NO clue what I was doing when my baby arrived and this book guided me every step.

Good luck with your pregnancy!

xx
 
my baby is 14 1/2 mths now. i tired the gina ford thing when she's 1 mth old. TOTAL disaster. it was impossible to put her on the schedule. she had a mind of her own & knew when she needed a nap & when she didnt . re: feeding, i breastfed & that "20 min on each side" leave me with blocked up ducts all the way to my armpits; & baby only had front milk - hence lots of gas & crying when put down (cos the gas was hurting her). i finally got mrs chee (lactation consultant) who told me that not necessarily 20 mins on each breast for everyone. for me, my baby had one breast each feed.

that said, my sis-in-law had a baby 3 months older than mine. she followed that book by the dot, & her baby followed it with no problems. she also breast-fed but gave formula at night & express at night instead of feeding directly. my best friend has 2 sons, tried it with her first, didn't work; tried it with her 2nd, worked wonderfully. my other friend had twins, she followed gina ford by the dot, her twins were sick a lot & not gaining weight much but she still followed strictly. i heard that in the beginning they would cry for the 15 mins (supposedly naptime), still pick them up although no nap just cry & still follow the book (also formula fed). and after several weeks, the babies went on the schedule.

all in all, i think it depends on your baby's temperament. if you have an easy baby, then for sure. but if you have a touchy/spirited one, maybe not. i'd think it'd be easier for formula fed babies to follow it, cos u'd know for sure no blocked ducts, and full babies & all (in any case if you bf, u should feed on demand). but do read the book to the end, especially the case files. miss ford lets babies cry for a whole night, and she can tolerate starving them for 12 hrs so that they'd take the bottle. i can never do that to my OWN baby. i certainly doubt of she can do that to HER own, but then she never had any. i guess it makes it easier to be baby nazi when she doesn;t need to empathize w/ the mothers. i think u can probably tell that i am very against gina ford. cos i think she's too strict. for crying out loud, those are just babies & they need love & affection.

in the meantime, maybe you can check out the baby whisperer who's more gentle & realistic.

good luck!
 
re:nuckle75 comments

nothing personal, nuckle 75. just wanted to let u guys know that npumping's not for everyone. i for one cannot. pumping somtimes only brings out the frontmilk, like i did & the hind milk get stuck in the breasts. that's why i ended up haveing blocked ducts all the way to the armpits.

but i don't mean to scare u, pumping still work for a lot of people. just be careful & pay attention to whether you baby is crying or not sleeping well, or her/his poo poo & wee.:baby2:
 
I agree that you should establish your breastfeeding first before you start thinking about a routine.
You will have enough to deal with without having to worry about sticking to, and making your baby stick to, a routine.
Just follow your babys lead in the beginning.
feed him if he is hungry. The constant suckling brings on your milk and lets baby practice how to feed as well as nourishes him
Remeber that the more the baby sucks the more your milk will come in, so limiting babys eating by forcing a routine onto him , especially in the early days could cause some problems.
As you gain more confidence you should be able to observe and understand your baby's behaviour (is he hungry and really eating? Or is he fussing and needing to comfort suck)
Then you could start thinking about routines.
Maybe you will notice that your baby actually already has his own routine.
The good piece of advise I received was to remember that this is not forever.
(although it will probably feel that way when you are in the middle of it)

I looked through the Gina ford book at the enthusiastic recommendations of a friend.
It wasnt for me.
BUt it worked for her.
I think it depends on the kind of person you are.
Are you into routines and schedules? Then it could be right for you.
But all I could see was my friends life being restricted because she constantly had to rush back home for her daughters nap, or feeding etc.
My baby was also sleeping through from about 6 weeks, so I think it really depends on the child and not necessarily the routine.
I read in the Great Ormond st baby book that sleeping through is a developmental thing. So it will happen when they're ready.
You could try exposing your child to more daylight during the daylight hours, to get his body rhythm adjusted.Open the curtains, take them outside.

I also picked up the Baby Whisperer by Tracey Hogg.
She also has a basic routine but her approach is much kinder.
Again I didnt really follow it but I did use it for reference.
But my favorite book is Baby Love by Robin Barker.
Everything you could wonder or worry about is covered by the book and its, no nonsense, commonsense.
Good luck with which ever route you decide to take!
 
I started using the routine as a guide, from about 9 or 10 weeks, and it helped a lot to establish some order to my and my baby's day, which made our family life easier. But I would add a number of caveats and reservations to following GF's advice:
1. As others mentioned, I don't think the GF routine is advisable in the early weeks. In my case, my newborn fed much more often than advised by the routine (especially during growth spurts), and personally, I don't think it would have been good for establishing our breastfeeding relationship.
2. My baby did not sleep through the night until several months later, so the main benefit of using the routine was in making our daytimes easier. My bub gradually reduced the number of his night feeds down to one night feed by around 12 weeks which was quite manageable, but this process of reduction started before I began using the GF routine, and I attribute it more to the techniques in the No-Cry Sleep Solution book. GF suggests leaving them to cry in their cot for some time virtually from birth, which I couldn't do.
3. I did not take the routine as set in stone. e.g. my baby would sometimes get hungry well before the scheduled feed times, and I would simply feed him earlier. The detailed nature of the GF routine implicitly puts you under pressure to adhere to all the times quite strictly, but this was not always a humane option!
4. Your baby may find his/her own routine after a few weeks, rather than you having to impose an artificial one from a book. Although mine cried a lot less as time went on, his feeds and daytime sleeps continued to be quite unpredictable and due to the general chaos this created, I felt it worth giving GF a try.
5. I founded the GF book itself quite painful reading as she came across as heartless and bossy!

Despite these caveats, however, I’m glad I used the GF routine, if only as a guide. It definitely helped me decipher my baby's cries and needs. Before using the routine, I was often unsure whether he was fussing out of hunger, sleepiness, over-stimulation, needing a nappy change, etc. But after starting the GF routine, I could usually calm him simply by doing what the routine advised at around that time of day (e.g. feed, nap, outdoor walk), often to my surprise! I do believe he became a more contented and easier baby with the routine. It took a lot of the guesswork out of first-time mothering and gave me more confidence in handling the baby, compared to when he was feeding and sleeping ‘on demand’. Plus, I could plan daily activities and outings e.g. my husband and I could enjoy a quiet dinner together in the evenings, after putting the little one to bed at 7pm. Sorry for long post, but hope this is helpful!
 
Hi,
Just thought I would add something to the Gina Ford debate. I too tried this routine with my first child. I gave up very quickly as I found it difficult to keep to the routine let alone get my child to do the same. I am usually quite routine orientated but the detail was too great for me.

I also feel that we need to look at why we want our babies in this routine, is it really what is best for the baby? We live such busy, scheduled lives that many of us want our babies to fit into this. Maybe it's time to slow down and let our babies take the lead. I don't have an answer, as my life is as scheduled as the next person, though I do sometimes wish I could slow down. Though having said all this both my children sorted out their own routine by themselves, which fitted into our family, so again I question the need for imposed routines, that can involve trauma for both mother and child. Babies seem to sort it out for themselves.

I would also like to point out that Gina Ford doesn't have any children of her own, so whilst she is quite willing to try these techniques on other people's children she has never carried them out 24/7 with her own.

Jools
 
I remember the urge to read this kind of book before the birth of my first child, and during her early weeks of life. I remember the desperate need for reassurance that order can be imposed on the expected chaos, and expect this is especially true for those of us without prior experience with babies. It did feel comforting to be told what to do. I read the Babywhisperer as well as part of Gina Ford, and treated their pronouncements as gospel, since I didn't know anything.

Upon re-reading with more experience of my own, they both sound unbearably opinionated; they are right and everybody else is wrong. The worst part for me is the predictions of dire armageddon if you don't follow their advice, that your baby will become a demanding little horror who makes your life a misery. If that were the case, how did generations of people cope before the publishing of the book? How about people in other cultures which are not as clock-obsessed as our own - are their babies less contented than ours?

The one piece of information that I obtained from such books that I found valuable, but many people may find obvious, is that very young babies do need naps very frequently, and it can be hard to get them to sleep if they are overstimulated and have been kept awake too long. (Gina Ford puts that in a less kind manner, that "babies under x age must *not be permitted* to stay awake for more than x hours"!) This can be achieved by many different ways that will probably not scar your child for life. I was determined (on advice of books) not to rock or feed my baby to sleep, and had a lot of trouble getting her to sleep in the early months as a result, which drove me to despair at times.

I am expecting my second baby in a few weeks and intend to go with the flow a bit more to make my life easier in the early months, and work on changing habits that I don't like later when I have more energy. I also intend to waste not a second pumping milk or washing/sterilising pumps and bottles until it is really necessary, as I know this is not the best way to stimulate milk supply, so I would prefer to take the opportunity to nap instead!
 
I agree w/ JennyB & Jools. I too had a "desperate need for reassurance that order can be imposed on the expected chaos", I thought it would make my life easier if I had a plan to stick to which would work. Instead, I went crazy trying to fit my baby into the GF schedule. finally i gave up and life became easier, especially when I asked my ped about putting a baby on schedule. he replied "putting a baby on schedule is for YOUR convenience, not hers." then i figured, i should just try to let her spend more "awake time" during the day & "sleep time" during nite (my baby spent her day sleeping & nights a wake for the first month). It took me 3 days to turn around her day & night. and eventually, maybe at 3 months, she fell on her OWN schedule. i heard that they all do, eventually, usually @ around 2-3 mths, which could felt like forever when u're a new mother.

i also agree that my friends who had babies on the GF schedules had to rush home to feed/nap the baby. Hence the parents' lives are not as flexible.

In the end, I think take it easy, most babies eventually sleep for longer stretches at night around 3-4 mths.
 
The main thing I took away from the GF book is that it's important for your baby to get plenty of nap times in the day. I thought keeping my 1st baby awake would make her sleep better, but it didn't. But once we established good napping, everything was easier, including feeding, bedtime etc, and eventually sleeping through from 12 weeks. My 2nd was a horror at night, despite good napping. I did everything the same with him as I did with my 1st but he never slept through the night confidently (and still doesn't). They just have different temperaments. I always go to them if they cry in the night and I breastfed until they were both 12 months old. I am convinced it's all in the nature and not in the nurture. And my 3rd is due in 7 weeks, and I have no intention of following any books, as school runs etc dictate our days now. But someone said this already, and I couldn't agree more: it's only for a short time in our lives and it's all over very quickly. Enjoy the baby time and breastfeeding. We wish it away because we are so sleep deprived, but looking back, I don't regret my decisions not to leave them to scream or withold feeds. But maybe I am too soft!
 
Hi Everyone,

Thanks so much for all your advice and tips on coping in the first few months. I think reading that book did freak me out as it is so dictatorial and you feel you would be doing something wrong by not following it. This of course makes us feel guilty and like "bad mothers" at a time when we are vulnerable.

It seems many of you used it as a guide rather than following it so strictly which is more likely to only cause the new mom stress.

Thanks for making me feel that my life will not have to turn into a boot camp and to just enjoy the time and let things unfold they way they are supposed to.

Sunrays

:baby:
 
Isnt it terrible the way we some of these so called experts make us feel?
I was chatting to a girl frined , who is expecting her second and she had been reading about letting her 1st child go to sleep on his own.
SHe was saying "I know that you are SUPPOSED to not go in and keep them company when they sleep, but I dont want to! Its so hard"
I thnk that the pressure is terrible.
The point I think a lot of us miss is that these techniques are meant to give us a choice.
Do you want to spend that time with your baby, giving him cuddles and watching him go to sleep?
Or would you prefer to be watching tele, or doing something else?
Neither is wrong and neither is right.
IT's all about whats right for you !
If you want to cuddle your baby to sleep then do it.
As I said before this will not last forever.
I hate to sound like a clihe but it is true that, all too soon, they wont want you to cuddle them
Relax and enjoy motherhood!
Its tough, its exhausting, its challenging. Sometimes you want to chuck it in.
But if your lucky enough to experience motherhood, make the most of it!
 
Contented Baby Book is a Winner

Dear Sunrays,

I used Gina Ford's book as soon as my milk had come in. I was SO daunted by the daily routines she sets out in her book and only stuck with them because I had my Mum there helping me. If you are going to do this on your own you will need to really persevere as trying to get into her routine is UTTERLY EXHAUSTING. However, if you are determined, as I was, this book is a total winner. Make sure you hire an industrial double breast pump - this will make getting into the routine and establishing your milk supply so much easier. I can give you info on where to hire from if you need.

Because of Gina, my daughter sleeps so well from 7-7 at age 4 months. The mums who crticised me for following her 'ridiculously strict' routine are the ones who are still getting up 5-7 times a night with their 6 month old babies and who are stressed as are their husbands. My daughter needed a llittle more sleep than Gina recommended, but I just used my judgement and made a few changes here and there. Otherwise, I cannot recommend this book highly enough. If you can persevere and follow her routine almost to the letter for 4 months the benefits you will reap are ENOURMOUS. Good luck!:burnout:
 
"Seems that as long as you love your child you'll have a happy child regardless of routine! hooray for common sense"

I would like to second this "hooray for common sense"

The reason everyone goes on about routines is to make the parent's life easier - not the baby's. Babies don't care if they are brought up with routine or without it. So if it a routine isn't making your life easier - stop using it.

Also it depends on your priorities.

My priority was to breastfeed first and have a routine second. So when these two priorities clashed it was easy for me to get rid of the routine in order to keep the breastfeeding.

Other mothers (and Gina Ford would fall into this category if she had children) have routine as a priority and so, if necessary, would stop the breastfeeding to keep it.

It is a very rare mother (but clearly from the post above occasionally possible) who can allow her baby to sleep for 12 hours a day without it affecting her milk supply.

Barb
 
Completely understand what you Barb, and others, are saying. Of course, if it doesn't suit you or it interrupts your milk supply it is not for you.

However, it can be done with the help of a breast pump, Gina's whole early programme is to encourage your supply and make sure you do not have any breastfeeding problems.

Sunrays, you started this forum and I wish you every happiness. Once you meet your baby you will be able to determine which direction you should take, but if you need help then Gina will at least point in the right direction even if every aspect of her routine does not suit you.

Maybe I am lucky and have an 'easy' baby (if there is such a thing!), but my little girl is so happy... all it takes is a little help from Mum to get your baby onto the right track. I promise you, the people who criticised me - of whom there were many - are the ones who are stressed out of their minds, get blocks of only 2 hours of sleep a night even at 6 months and whose husbands are going out of their brains because they are still having broken nights and cannot concentrate at work. I am in no way criticising people who don't use Gina, but if you can help yourself then why not is what I say!

All the best
 
barbwong_130 said:
The reason everyone goes on about routines is to make the parent's life easier - not the baby's.
Click to expand...

Does it really make Parent's life easier ? I'm not so sure at all.

It is quite stressful to try to follow the routines. Most of them just go against our maternal instincts.

I have to say that after the first month of trying to do everything "good" as you can read it in some books, I've decided to just follow my instinct. And you know what ? I have been far less tired and stressed out. My husband did see the drastic change in me, so he also felt better. And Maylie is now a beautiful happy baby that doesn't cry must at all :-) And here I thought in the beginning that she was a fussy baby, of course not ! She was just having needs that wasn't met, and didn't understand anything about routines or anything else.

They are exploiting the fact that most of us are vulnerable as new mother, and make us feel a failure when we are unable to follow their instruction.

Sorry if I "sound" a little angry but all these kind of books did sabotage my first month of motherhood ! Just thinking about it.... RRRRrrrrrrrr.............

Mind you, I did read this Gina Books, but from the sound of it, I'll do anything to avoid it !

:wink:
 
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