thanks for the support!

carang

carang

Registered User
for those of you who frequent this website, I would like to say THANK YOU!

as many of you know, i frequent a few different sites. i always post under my real name (maybe that's stupid...). i have had a cyber stalker for about 3-4 years now. every once in a while s/he rears his/her ugly head and posts packs of lies regarding one of our businesses. their posts get very personal and at one point they even posted our home address. at the time we were living in db and my husband was fairly well known in the area.

anyway, this person has been banned from at least one website on 2 or 3 occasions due to their disparaging remarks. i always worry that people will read their posts and believe what they say and that it will harm our small business.

anyway, this person has reappeared (not on any of the geo sites!) and i always find it very discouraging. it literally makes me feel ill and i cannot sleep. i'm sure this is the reaction they are hoping to achieve....

i just wanted to say thank you to all of you who have thanked me for any of my posts that you have found even remotely helpful. i appreciate it. especially tonight!


and thank you rani and shri for running such respectable sites.


(did that make any sense?)
 
Complete sense. I for one always think that your advice is great, down to earth and useful. I'm sorry you have had to put up with such a difficult situation.

Are there any legal steps that you can take? I ask because I know that a certain baby author has taken contributors to a message board in the UK to court for their remarks about her books.
 
thanks jools! i have thought about it, but i don't know if it would be worth the effort.

everytime s/he starts it seems very innocent. and then i reply to a question and get hit with this garbage. the last post they made implied that we harmed dogs or left one in DB when we left. he said that we were illegal and unhygenic etc. it is utterly ridiculous and the people that know us know that would never be the case. we are hopelessly rigid about hygiene etc. as the animals live in our home. with small kids, do you think we'd want poop etc around?????

anyway, the said thread has been removed from the other site finally.

i don't know why i take it so personally...but it always causes me great anxiety. and i then reconsider whether i should take part in any discusssions ever...

but thanks again! i do appreciate it!
 
carang,

Don't worry about such a crazy person. There'll always be crazy people out there. I know you're a person who really loves dogs and you did gave me lots of nice advice when I first got my puppy. And you do have sound advice to parents and others with regards to other stuff. Don't worry about the crazy person. And please, don't fall into the person's trap of not wanting to take part in any discussions. I've had that feeling with a certain person on another site before and I know how you feel.
 
carang said:
thanks sunnie....any news on the adoption front?
Click to expand...

Thanks for asking. We've sent in our papers and the welfare department is asking for more documents and we're waiting for them from Singapore. Hopefully, things will be fine and we'll get our baby in about 6 to 8 mths' time
 
Dear Cara,

It's appaling that people could be that vindictive! It's apparent that you've got a hell of a lot more going for you and no matter how dirty or underhanded these accusations are remember that they are all this person has; (s)he cannot touch you and your family so they use false allegations to feed their own insecurities, as clearly the person (s)he is pales in comparison to the person you are.

You have been nothing but honest and helpful from what I've seen of you here and asiaxpat. You don't BS which I really appreciate and in fact your drive as a mum has encouraged me to persue a baby/mum-related enterprise (we'll see how it goes, I work from home so I've already got a lot on my plate not to mention it could turn out to be inspiration on a whim and not v. practical!)

I think you should take legal action. If anything it tells your kids who will be using the internet in the future that it is a) important and b) you are able to protect yourself from abuse from the internet.

Good Luck and remember you have plenty of support!!

Nashua
 
thanks, nash. i have contemplated legal action in the past. especially when this person saw fit to post our address! i only hope that people won't judge what this person says about our business as true without giving us the benefit of the doubt. we don't make a lot of $ from the business, it basically pays our rent. we even had the opportunity of living somewhere in HK rent/mortgage free, but it would have meant giving up the business and my husband REALLY loves what he does, so we said "no, thanks" to that opportunity just so the business could continue.
 
Cara,

We love having you on our sites. You've helped so many people and that's what matters. I'm with the others, don't let 1 crazy person get to you. :bighug
 
Hi Carang

I have been on this website for over a year and always find that your advice is from your experience and it is not offensive to anyone and u sound pretty cool about stuff so u should not let one crazy person ruin your life. I understand going legally is not helpful. i had a crazy neighbour he would ring our bell at odd hour, he got our tel no and call us in the middle of the night and leave the music on and just leave for 2 hours so your phone is hung, he actually slashed our sofas when we were getting new ones, he would abuse, we called the cops 3 times on him but it was of no use as they kept saying he has not physically harmed u so they couldn't do anything. finally after 5 years we moved couldnt take his s**t anymore and it was before my son.

If I was u i would atleast inform others who this luny is that way we would know because u are right if people who dont know u might take his or her comments seriously

Best of luck


Neha
 
Neha,

Wow! Can't believe the amount of patience that you guys have!

Cara,

Yes, in short, we love having you on this forum! And in time to come, I'll probably be screaming for help and advice from you on how to raise a baby. So don't disappear! Or, I might end up being your stalker, need to stalk you down for advice! Just kidding!
 
problem is... i don't know who this loonie is...i think he has read EVERY post i've EVER posted on EVERY site i've ever gone on... at one point he basically posted my views on everything and then used them against me....although, i would admit to being opinionated, i don't think i'm as bad as he makes me out to be.

(so, sunnie....how far along the process are you now?)
 
carang said:
problem is... i don't know who this loonie is...i think he has read EVERY post i've EVER posted on EVERY site i've ever gone on... at one point he basically posted my views on everything and then used them against me....although, i would admit to being opinionated, i don't think i'm as bad as he makes me out to be.

(so, sunnie....how far along the process are you now?)
Click to expand...

I had someone like that stalking me on my OWN BLOG! Can you bloody imagine that? But I do kinda know who he is. Yes, he's from geoexpat. But he's stopped because I've tightened the security on my blog.

With the adoption, we're hoping that in a fortnight or so, home study can start. But issue is that, hubby might be starting his travels soon as well.
 
Wow. This cyber stalker of yours must have lots of time in his/her hands, carang!

I like reading your thoughts and opinions on this website. Keep 'em coming! And cyber-stalkers aside, remember, you can't please anyone. There're bound to be flame-throwers and trolls here and there on every web community. They are part of the fun! :)
 
not to sound awful, but i'm glad i'm not the only one with the stalker issue! but on your own blog??? you just wanna shout, "get a life, moron!"

so glad to hear that the process is so far advanced! you must be getting excited!

and sage, trolls etc can be part of the fun, i agree until it gets personal. there's no need for him to post our address and a pack of lies that could actually harm us. it's not like posting something negative about mcdonald's or 7-11. they rake it in hand over fist. we on the other hand struggle every month, so a little bad publicity can do us GREAT harm. people with dogs usually act like they are their children and take them as seriously as we take our own kids.

thanks again, everyone for the positive re-inforcement. i honestly wasn't looking for a pat on the back, more just to vent my frustrations, anger and tears.

you guys are awesome (and i don't even know what you look like!)
 
cara,

Yes, on my own blog. Imagine that! But I know who the loser is. And the irony is, he was the one that helped hubby get his job in HK. And my documents arrive from Spore today. Hubby will be popping in the stuff to the welfare department on Wed. Keeping fingers crossed!
 
unbelieveable!

my idiot makes out like he knows us...but i'm sure we've never met him/her personally...it is quite possible that he knows who we are, we knew a lot of people in DB, but we have no idea who he is.
 
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