son not wanting to go to school?!!!!!

S

shaz

Banned
Hello everyone,
My son is in P1, the first term was fine then after going back to school after the xmas holidays then jumping into second term - changes - for the past week or so he has been saying every morning that he doesnt want to go to school and he is in tears. This is making me feel really bad to see him so upset. yes i am in contact with the school to try and pinpoint the problem however we cant really identify any..im abit lost as what to do..im feeling so sad for him that i cant focus on anything else clearly at the moment. anyone had experiences? how did it get better? thanks for any advice shared.
sharon
 
This can be a very difficult time. I went through exactly the same thing as a child at this age. It is one of my vivid memories from childhood. I remember loving school when I first went and actually cried in my room when the Christmas holidays came, as I wanted to go to school.

Then after the holidays I became a school refuser for a few weeks. There was nothing particular about school that was upsetting me. I wasn't being bullied, the work wasn't too difficult etc. My parents went through everything they could think of. Looking back now, in my situation, I just think that I had, had such a good time at home over the Christmas holiday that I didn't want to go to school, I wanted to stay at home with my Mum.

In the end my Mum took me to school and sat in on a few lessons, gradually withdrawing herself and I was fine.

If you have ruled out everything else it might be that your son just had such a fab time over the holidays that he wants to stay with you. This might not be easy, but maybe try to shift the focus. So when he is getting ready for school, talk about other things, so that the getting ready is almost an aside thing. Or try to make it into a game, so that he thinks getting ready for school is fun. If you place alot of focus on the school thing, which you're bound to because you are so worried, then his focus will also be on it and then the problem can just get bigger and bigger for him.

Good luck, I hope things get better for you and your son.

Jools
 
Thank you Jools for your message, and your own experience which helps better coming from someone who experienced it first hand. We are trying to be patient about the whole thing and shall just take day by day. He definately keeps saying that he wants another holiday so.....i will try some of your ideas if all else fails, thanks again, it cheered me up some
 
i remember the same thing happening to me too. i used to cried endlessly in P1 in the classroom, just saying i miss mommy. i had my whole class and teachers comforting me and nothing works. my best friends remember this up til now. now that i'm a mom, i realize it must be tough for my parents back then as well. but rest assured no permanent damage done, i think it was just a kid missing home, he'll get used to it in time i'm sure.
 
My younger daughter loves school. But every now and then says she doesn?t want to go. It took me a while to realize that this happened when her father was away (he doesn?t go away often only three or four times a year). I think it is that she?s not able to express her feelings about the change at home and so it comes out in, ?I don?t want to go to school.?

This may not be the case with your son but has anything at home changed?

Best wishes,
Barb
 
Hi Barb,
Nothing really changed at home that i know of, he had a great xmas though...its the crying that gets me..he rings me this am from the bus crying....
 
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