anotherone
Registered User
Just thought I would post my experience here and if anyone has / is facing the same issues we might share some ideas (ok ok I am just after a rant really).
Helper #1: got her when I went back to FT work after a short maternity leave. She claimed that she has only been working for one local family for 12 years but was terminated - and she couldn't give me any coherent reason for it. I was blinded by the "12 years" bit and thought how wrong can it go if her previous employer kept her for 12 years? Ended up hiring her without bothering with reference check (she said her old boss wasn't picking up the phone - and I just accepted it....), and firing her after 2 weeks because it was obvious that she had mental problems (which didn't manifest themselves during the interview).
Helper #2: finished contract, I did insist on speaking to her employer first, who said this helper was good with their twins. Bingo right? Took her in to stay at our place while waiting for the visa to be processed, didn't ask her to do any work at all (so it was basically a hotel stay with free food etc for her) cos I wanted to be fair and, well, law-abiding. She disappeared for the entire day on the second day of her stay (claiming that she had to go to the consulate). Came back, started ignoring the crying baby (not that I asked her to look after him, but you don't just walk past a wailing baby do you?) and asked if we can both back out from signing (no reason given). Then it dawned on me that she vanished off the whole day to go to interviews while she was staying with us and after she has agreed to sign a contract with us.
Helper #3: recommended by our part-time Chinese helper (they used to work together), so again bingo right? It took us less than a week to figure out that she is a pathological liar - she would lie about every little thing, things that aren't event worth lying about. But I thought, well a lot of helpers lie (don't flame me for saying this!) so I might just have to live with it. But I did sit her down almost every other day, just to tell her that she can tell us everything and we would never shout at her, that dishonesty is the only thing that we don't tolerate in this household etc. Then I came home from work one day, saw this big bump on the baby's head, and there she came leaping out from the kitchen all eager to tell me that the baby was injured. But she couldn't explain to me how that happened. So my good old Chinese helper drip-fed me information (it's her annoying habit) throughout the week, and it transpired that what happened was she had put the baby on her own bed despite very clear instructions from the Chinese helper not to, the baby somehow banged his head on the bedframe. Which for me is not a real issue cos that's what babies are supposed to do. What really upset me was the fact that she then asked the Chinese helper "is it ok if I don't tell Maam?". When the Chinese helper gave her a piece of her mind, she then had the audacity to ask again "oh in that case is it ok if WE tell Maam that the baby hurt himself when playing in the living room?"
Suffice to say, helper #3 is a goner. As soon as we find a good replacement, that is.
So I contacted a certain agency that was highly recommended by someone here on Geobaby, and found this particular helper who gave me all the right answers to my questions (by now I had a much better idea what questions to ask). Was almost gonna sign her until I suddenly remembered that I had never seen any references (duh!!). Asked for it over a few days, all she could produce were a couple of dodgy-looking letters from the "mother of the previous employer" plus a load of apologies. I wasn't comfy with that (see Helper #1 above) so I called the whole thing off.
Then I put up an ad on Geoexpat, interviewed two carefully selected applicants - "Rh" with the perfect baby experience and "Li" with the good attitude and enthusiasm. Offered "Rh" the job, which she accepted straightaway. Then she started postponing meeting me to sign the contract for the next 4 days, claiming she was still busy at work. And stupid me, I actually gave her the benefit of the doubt and waited for her, all the while telling "Li" in all honesty that she was my number 2 choice, and if "Rh" doesn't get back to me soon I will sign with her instead ("Li" was VERY keen to sign with me). On the fifth day I got a text from "Rh" telling me she in fact "had more interviews to go to", and when I pointed out to her that she's been lying to me and been stringing me along all week (and stringing "Li" along indirectly) despite clearly accepting my job offer, all she said of course was "sorry". I found out she has arranged to interview this weekend with an Australian family who also posted on Geoexpat (get in touch if this is you and if you want more info). By now "Li" has signed with someone else.
Now I have gone back to the agency (the owner of which has made it very clear to me that I am a time-waster and is not really wanted). Let's see what I find next - in any case by the time the new helper arrives, the baby would be a year old already....
Helper #1: got her when I went back to FT work after a short maternity leave. She claimed that she has only been working for one local family for 12 years but was terminated - and she couldn't give me any coherent reason for it. I was blinded by the "12 years" bit and thought how wrong can it go if her previous employer kept her for 12 years? Ended up hiring her without bothering with reference check (she said her old boss wasn't picking up the phone - and I just accepted it....), and firing her after 2 weeks because it was obvious that she had mental problems (which didn't manifest themselves during the interview).
Helper #2: finished contract, I did insist on speaking to her employer first, who said this helper was good with their twins. Bingo right? Took her in to stay at our place while waiting for the visa to be processed, didn't ask her to do any work at all (so it was basically a hotel stay with free food etc for her) cos I wanted to be fair and, well, law-abiding. She disappeared for the entire day on the second day of her stay (claiming that she had to go to the consulate). Came back, started ignoring the crying baby (not that I asked her to look after him, but you don't just walk past a wailing baby do you?) and asked if we can both back out from signing (no reason given). Then it dawned on me that she vanished off the whole day to go to interviews while she was staying with us and after she has agreed to sign a contract with us.
Helper #3: recommended by our part-time Chinese helper (they used to work together), so again bingo right? It took us less than a week to figure out that she is a pathological liar - she would lie about every little thing, things that aren't event worth lying about. But I thought, well a lot of helpers lie (don't flame me for saying this!) so I might just have to live with it. But I did sit her down almost every other day, just to tell her that she can tell us everything and we would never shout at her, that dishonesty is the only thing that we don't tolerate in this household etc. Then I came home from work one day, saw this big bump on the baby's head, and there she came leaping out from the kitchen all eager to tell me that the baby was injured. But she couldn't explain to me how that happened. So my good old Chinese helper drip-fed me information (it's her annoying habit) throughout the week, and it transpired that what happened was she had put the baby on her own bed despite very clear instructions from the Chinese helper not to, the baby somehow banged his head on the bedframe. Which for me is not a real issue cos that's what babies are supposed to do. What really upset me was the fact that she then asked the Chinese helper "is it ok if I don't tell Maam?". When the Chinese helper gave her a piece of her mind, she then had the audacity to ask again "oh in that case is it ok if WE tell Maam that the baby hurt himself when playing in the living room?"
Suffice to say, helper #3 is a goner. As soon as we find a good replacement, that is.
So I contacted a certain agency that was highly recommended by someone here on Geobaby, and found this particular helper who gave me all the right answers to my questions (by now I had a much better idea what questions to ask). Was almost gonna sign her until I suddenly remembered that I had never seen any references (duh!!). Asked for it over a few days, all she could produce were a couple of dodgy-looking letters from the "mother of the previous employer" plus a load of apologies. I wasn't comfy with that (see Helper #1 above) so I called the whole thing off.
Then I put up an ad on Geoexpat, interviewed two carefully selected applicants - "Rh" with the perfect baby experience and "Li" with the good attitude and enthusiasm. Offered "Rh" the job, which she accepted straightaway. Then she started postponing meeting me to sign the contract for the next 4 days, claiming she was still busy at work. And stupid me, I actually gave her the benefit of the doubt and waited for her, all the while telling "Li" in all honesty that she was my number 2 choice, and if "Rh" doesn't get back to me soon I will sign with her instead ("Li" was VERY keen to sign with me). On the fifth day I got a text from "Rh" telling me she in fact "had more interviews to go to", and when I pointed out to her that she's been lying to me and been stringing me along all week (and stringing "Li" along indirectly) despite clearly accepting my job offer, all she said of course was "sorry". I found out she has arranged to interview this weekend with an Australian family who also posted on Geoexpat (get in touch if this is you and if you want more info). By now "Li" has signed with someone else.
Now I have gone back to the agency (the owner of which has made it very clear to me that I am a time-waster and is not really wanted). Let's see what I find next - in any case by the time the new helper arrives, the baby would be a year old already....
