Nursery or not?

Will you let your child attend Nursery / Did your child attend Nursery?

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Our son just turned 2 and he'll start nursery school at the beginning of January. Initially I was quite anti-nursery school because I was thinking that it was too soon for my son to "go off to school" and it would force him to transition from being a baby too quickly.

But, over the past 6 months or so a lot of things have really made me think differently about the entire situation. I guess my hesitation to do a lot of things comes from the fact that I always compare things to how things are in my home country.. In my home country, for example, it's absolutely ridiculous to think that a child would go to kindergarten at 3-years-old. If children are going to go to pre-school (what is called nursery school here) they start when they're usually 3.5-4-years-old but kindergarten isn't until 5-6-years-old.

But there are also a lot of other differences that I wasn't really considering that make comparing things where I'm originally from to here really hard.

For example, where I'm from everyone drives a car and so their mobility is different. It's so easy just to load your child and things up in a car and go visit friends. There's also a lot of free activities available to involve your children in. It's easy to visit people in their homes and have impromptu playgroups because there is more space and the culture is more open to opening one's home to others. Also, there isn't any competition when it comes to education. If you want your child to go to a certain school, you don't have to get on a waiting list and then pass an interview. It's really a different world!

Here, we don't have a car. There aren't many free activities to get a toddler involved in. It's not common to just drop in on friends and make an afternoon of it at their house.

So, with my son's outgoing personality and his high level of curiosity, we felt it was good to put him in nursery school. Honestly, we don't care if he "learns" anything at all, as long as he's able to interact with other children in a positive and safe environment on a regular basis. I guess we don't take it all that seriously. And instead of making ourselves stressed by running him from activity to activity all over Hong Kong, trying to fill up his day, it's better to just set a block of time for him to be at nursery school on a daily basis.

But, I'll report back on how things go when he has actually started. The school runs from 9 am to 4 pm but we told the school that we didn't want him there all day (they nap for 3 hours in the afternoon anyway) so we'll just go and pick him up around 1 pm. I think it will be a nice balance of away from home and at home.
 
besides the reasons stated here, other reason to send your kids to pre nursery would be for .. getting a higher chance of sending your kids to a good kindergarten. because sending them to pre nursery at 2 means they have adapt to the kindergarten lifestyle , hence will cry less.. and easier to take care when they go k1. so , higher chance of getting in to the kindergartens that you want.
like thanka2, i tend to compare how things are done with my home country.. and i am just not ready for her to go to school when she turns 2. i feel she'll have to wake up early for 5 days a week, or have a routine life,, for the rest of her life, going to kindergarten, primary school , high school, university , working.. why start so early? let her enjoy 1 more year of non routine lifestyle.. bonding with her grandmother,, ..she does have her own routine now, just not determined by the school. i dont know, i am just not ready yet..
how can i decide one year ahead, whether she is ready to go to school at 2?
 
reei said:
besides the reasons stated here, other reason to send your kids to pre nursery would be for .. getting a higher chance of sending your kids to a good kindergarten. because sending them to pre nursery at 2 means they have adapt to the kindergarten lifestyle , hence will cry less.. and easier to take care when they go k1. so , higher chance of getting in to the kindergartens that you want.
like thanka2, i tend to compare how things are done with my home country.. and i am just not ready for her to go to school when she turns 2. i feel she'll have to wake up early for 5 days a week, or have a routine life,, for the rest of her life, going to kindergarten, primary school , high school, university , working.. why start so early? let her enjoy 1 more year of non routine lifestyle.. bonding with her grandmother,, ..she does have her own routine now, just not determined by the school. i dont know, i am just not ready yet..
how can i decide one year ahead, whether she is ready to go to school at 2?
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We didn't have to really decide when my son was 1-years-old if we were going to put him in nursery school. In fact, back in October-November of this year (right before he turned 2-years-old) we just spent an entire afternoon visiting 8 different nursery schools and then just chose one. It was a lot simpler than I thought it would be. We chose one that has a good reputation as an organization and therefore if we wanted him to attend their kindergarten later that option would probably be open for us.

About waking up early, yes, I do agree that it's going to make my son have to wake up earlier. But, my thinking is that he already wakes up pretty early (we're always trying to "trick" him into sleeping in longer--especially on the weekends) and him waking up an extra hour earlier won't hurt anything--he'll just probably be more willing to take a good nap and maybe get to bed a bit earlier. And I think it really depends on where you live and how far you have to travel to get your kid to whatever activity/nursery school they're attending.

A year ago when my son was 1-year-old, however, I definitely was still anti-nursery school but as he's become more independent--especially from 18-months on and holds his own very well, even with children several years older than him, I guess that has made me also more comfortable with him going out into the "big wide world" of education a bit sooner. I see it more like an adventure for him now than an obligation.

And I always think that our options are open and that just gives me more peace overall.

But, yes it is totally an individual thing. But, for me, it was a big day when I woke up and was like: "Wow! HK is not the same as my home place and I can stop holding myself to the standard of my home place now and start developing my own views based on the circumstances." Big day indeed! :agree:
 
my son, as i've stated already, started when he was 3yr 7m. my daughter will be the same. this was because we are using the gov't voucher. in order to use it, they have to be 2yr8m by September 1 (if memory serves me correctly). both of my kids are/were only 2yr7m at the start of the school year. as such, they've had to wait until the following year.

my son LOVES going to school. when he's very naughty, i threaten him with not going to school and he immediately says he'll behave himself. my daughter has spent the past year and a half going to drop him off and pick him up at school. she's so ready to be going herself.

for the first year, my son only went for 1/2 day. for k2 we decided to up it to a full day. he has a "nap" for 1.5 hours in the afternoon. sometimes, he sleeps, sometimes he doesn't. doesn't matter to me. eating his lunch at school (provided by the school) has become something he loves to do. he tries and likes things that i would never have made for him (congee! YUCK!) and he has become less picky about what he eats, which is a very good thing.

my daughter will start school next september. she will start in a full day immediately. it is just too complicated to do otherwise (we live far from the school and there is no school bus to where we live!).

my son (turning 5 in feb) is now learning to read and write chinese, how to speak chinese and how to get on with others. i'm VERY happy with it all in general.

as thanka says, it all comes down to circumstances.
 
my daughter will not start nursery till she is 3...which to many HK moms is "late" - however, the circumstances for my daughter are unit and to make a long story short, I believe that as she is already a little behind in her language and gross motor skills, it would be beneficial for her in the long run to be the "oldest" kid in the class rather than the "youngest" kid in the class and always feel like she's lagging behind (her b-day's in late august)....that's just our family though...would say we aren't the typical chinese family...
 
Hmm, I know this is an old thread but want to chime in anyway. I certainly agree that circumstances (and kids' personalities) are different for each family, but I would like to disagree that with the notion that kids will necessarily be bored if they are at home. I don't plan to send my two-year-old to preschool until he's at least 3, but that doesn't mean we just sit at home all day, nor does it mean that he's bored when we're at home! We're active--he helps me with dishes after each meal, we make cookies, make playdough, today we planted seeds in a pot to watch grow, we have a nature table with items we collect on our walks, we sing songs, go to the park, etc. He gets plenty of social time, plenty of intellectual stimulation, and plenty of downtime too--which is important! So why not preschool? Well, for one, it's freakin' expensive! And since we're not on a typical expat budget, that's important to us. I'd much rather save that money for future schooling and enjoy the time I have with him now than send him off to school so early.

And if I sound a tiny bit defensive, I really am sorry. I just get tired of being asked if my son is bored (with the implication that I'm not doing everything I should for him) when people know we "only" go to one formal playgroup a week.
 
To report back. My son started nursery school in January. He loves it. He fussed a bit the first few days but no tears were shed and now when we take him he runs happily off to his classroom. He likes the trip to school too (which for us is like 40 minutes long). It's been a good experience for him. His teachers tell us that he is very clever and that he speaks in full sentences in Cantonese and uses funny idioms sometimes. He is also a really good friend to his classmates--so full of fun.

The only problem with sending him to school is that, well, sometimes we don't...because we don't take it all too seriously, there have been times when for one reason or another (sniffles/cold, other family things going on, potty training) we kept him home for a week at a time almost--I think the school doesn't quite know what to make of us but he keeps going and they haven't complained.

As a mom who works outside the home (and really enjoys it) I don't have the energy to be super creative and plan and execute tons of activities with my son at home.

I actually never remember my mom really doing that sort of thing--we just lived life naturally--we participated in life together but I don't think my parents went out of their way to become child "educators" (although they read to us and taught us many things) or "entertainers." In fact, my mom used to say when we'd complain that we were bored, "Why are you looking at me? Do I look like the entertainment committee?"

So, the fact that my parents didn't have all these well-thought-out activities for us doesn't make me sad or feel like I missed out at all.

The truth is, when my husband and I come home from work, we're tired and it makes me feel good to know that my son has had an active day at school enjoying himself and I don't feel obligated to have some sort of specific activity planned for him.

If something comes up then so be it--if I feel inspired to do something with him that is beyond normal family life, then that's cool but I certainly don't feel obligated to do anything like that. For him, the thing he likes most is just to be around us and to interact with us. That's the beauty of toddlers--they don't have high expectations.
 
Well, actually I agree with you that toddlers don't need a lot of activites or entertainment. That's why I think HK parents can be so funny--sending their kids to all sorts of things. I don't go out of my way to plan lots of special things for my son--most of what we do is just live our life but he gets included all along the way--helping with dishes, helping with other projects. He learns plenty that way and doesn't get bored either. Before people had helpers then they didn't have time to sit around and "entertain" the kids--the kids just participated. That's what we do, and I think it works well for us. I don't think preschool is at all bad, and I think that for parents who work it makes sense, not knowing if a helper would prefer to just get a task done rather than take the effort to include a child. Certainly dishes take longer when my son is helping, but it still gets done and he has fun and I'm not paying buckets of money for him to play at a water table!
 
And please note, I'm not claiming that my way is best. I've no doubt that there are lots of great schools that my child would love. But in a city where starting school at age 2 is just the norm, and where many parents spend a lot of time and energy stressing about school, I do claim that it's not necessary for a child to go to preschool in order to thrive. (And it's not necessary to be a preschool teacher oneself in order to help a kid thrive at home!) Daily life is full of learning opportunities.
 
Good one. About 2-3 month back when our daughter turned 18 months she wanted to be out with similar aged children and was really enjoying the play time with them. We thought we'll try a play school and got her admission for 2 hours a day. She is so happy to be at Playschool and even started crying while we go to take her back after 2 hours. I think its worth to keep them with their aged kids and let them enjoy the time.
 
I am struggling a bit with this as well and have a few questions for anyone with experience with the school system here.

I haven't found a pre-nursery (is that what they call the under 2.5 year old classes?) that I'm totally happy with and I am happy to keep my daughter at home for as long as possible. However, I would like for her to eventually attend kindergarten at 3 years, either at ESF or an international school. Do the schools look at past activities and pre-nursery when they make decisions on who to accept? Would not having a pre-nursery on her record be a problem? I assume that one of the benefits of pre-nursery is that the children are more comfortable during interviews for kindergarten - any experience with this?

Thanks!
 
My elder attends Singapore International School - no other pre-school required for those entering at the PY1 (equivalent to HK's K2) level. He had gone to playgroup and nursery when we lived in Singapore, but I think the PY1 syllabus to paced with the assumption that one did not attend any other classes. The SIS PY1 interview was also very non-threatening. I only told my son that he was going to meet some people who would want to get to know him better, now that he's moved to HK, and that he should feel free to ask questions as well. He bounded out happily after the interview, telling me that they asked him a total of six questions, four of which were "getting to know you" questions and two was asking the child to describe a couple of pictures that they were shown. I have no experience with any other type of local/international school as we did not consider them.
 
i know at HKIS they say it doesn't make a difference if they attend pre-nursery (PN) or not. i guess whether your student interviews well is not about what you learn but whether or not your child sees / interacts enough with "strangers" to act naturally in a foreign situation. my daughter won't be attending PN till 3years old and I think it should be fine
 
I had my doubt, but I am 100% pro nusery now....as a working mum...i think it much better for kids to spend time in Nusery with trained professional and other kids then at home with a helper.

I send my daughter to Caritas when she is 2, it amazing to see how much she enjoy it.....she first start for half day, then she start crying when I pick her up during lunch time, because she want to stay in school with the other kids (Caritas is full day nusery)...so I decided to keep her there full day after 4 months.

Within one week she start her full day nusery, she is toilet train and quit her pacifier in the same week.... All thanks to the school teachers... (i have been trying to train her myself at home, it never work !)

To happily,

I send my daughter to Caritas nusery as it close to home, and she is accepted by both ESF and Small World...
 
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