Need your extra Breast Milk for my tinee tiny..

R

rnih

Registered User
I've seen old posts about ladies wanting to donate their extra milk production to a milk bank, but since HK doesn't have a system, some do so directly. If you are healthy, willing and able I would love to get your extra BM for my baby girl.
I tried for 16 weeks to breast feed my baby. I had always wanted to breast feed. My baby lost a lot of weight after her birth due to my low milk supply. After weeks of constant feedings, pumping, taking supplements, multiple meetings with lactation consultant I was still not producing enough milk for my baby, and she's always distressed at feeding times and I have now needed to mix feed in order for her to be adequately fed, but she's now 5 months old and 3month clothes still fit her loose :( . I have such low milk supply due to major breast surgery I had 7 years ago..so that I was able to produce any milk at all was a surprise miracle..but it never got to the thick, creamy rich milk that really is best for babies' growth and immune system..

So, I'm on here hoping a few of you with little ones (4-5months old, I read it's best to get milk from same age group) might be overproducing and hate having the precious milk go to waste. Please contact me if you can help!
 
There is no need to stress out. You can always supplement with formula. It might be as good as breast milk.
 
Look, you've done your best, you've done a great job, but I think you're taking it a little too seriously. Formula isn't poison. I'm a big proponent of breastfeeding - I struggled to feed my first born who had a tongue tie. After three months, I started to add in bottles of formula and I did feel I'd 'failed' - but he was so much healthier and had better weight gain. I basically had to swallow my pride and accept that my dream of breastfeeding for a year was going out of the window. In the end, I stopped at 6 mths and was happy with my decision.
I exclusively breastfed baby 2 for 20 months! And baby 3 for 8 months. I hope to BF baby 4, but I've learned that what's best for baby and best for mum is 'whatever works'. If that's formula, then please embrace it. There's no shame. You haven't failed (except perhaps in your own eyes if you have certain expectations of motherhood). You honestly will be much happier if you switch to formula, or at least make formula a larger part of your baby's diet. If you enjoy the closeness of breastfeeding, then try to continue that as the first feed and last feed of the day, or as the night feed, but I really wouldn't advise going looking for milk donations. It's just not necessary, in my opinion.

Best of luck!
 
or why not bottle feed formula with your shirt removed (only at home, of course! ;) )... that way you still get the skin on skin but you can give your baby what will make her thrive.

honestly, women put entirely too much pressure on themselves to (1) have the perfect pregnancy-- eat/drink only the "right" stuff then (2) have the perfect birth experience (be it a c-section or all natural, no drugs) then (3) breastfeed exclusively and for longer and longer periods of time .... but it doesn't end there.... then they must (4) ensure their kids attend the proper pre-school classes then (5) get into the "best" schools ... it just never ends.

really... from what i can tell, when i look at my friends, i have no idea if they were bottle or breastfed when they were babies. while feeding your child is important, it is not the only thing and in the long run, whatever works for the entire family is the right thing. not whether you chose one thing or antoher.
 
While I agree in theory with some of the above posts, I also think that it's not wrong to feed your child milk from a milk bank etc as long as you make sure that the necessary health precautions are taken. Just as immunity can be transferred via milk, so can some infectious diseases, including AIDS. If you are in a country with an official milk bank, the mothers are screened for such viruses - but if you are taking milk from a stranger, you do not necessarily have that assurance.

I had an oversupply when I was pumping and would have gladly passed it on to someone, if anyone wanted it. Many mothers would prefer to give their child breastmilk rather than formula for a variety of reasons - and there is no shame in that either.
 
i agree with you wholeheartedly, nicolejoy...

without proper screening of the milk, how would one know that the milk is safe?
 
i wasn't being sarcastic or judgemental.

i was asking a serious question.

the entire point of my original post is that there should not be any judgement, if she has to use formula, if she continues breastfeeding or if she decides to share milk.
 
Some women will request (and pay for) milk donors to have similar blood tests to what they would need if they were donating to a milk bank. Others take the point of view that "if you are feeding that milk to your own child, then obviously you don't have any of those scary infections that would have showed up in prenatal testing anyway". Others may not worry about it at all.

While I personally would donate milk, I am not sure that I would accept milk from someone else, possibly unless it was a very close friend. I do understand the reasons why a woman WOULD want to though, and I respect that. That said, formula is generally safe and healthy - although I would never buy Chinese formula after that melamine scare a couple of years ago!!
 
As Koan said, it's about informed choice.

The original poster has chosen the option she's most comfortable with, so why not support her in that choice, rather than imposing our own or turning it into a debate?

It is entirely inappropriate to tell a mother what she "should" do. Instead, provide all available options, information, risks (including the risks of formula which are not insignificant) and give her the power to choose for herself, no judgement..

Good luck rnhi, I wish you all the best with your little one :)
 
i never said that she SHOULDN'T... only that she shouldn't feel like less of a mother if she has to resort to using formula!

i was NOT being judgemental. i was trying to point out that sometimes women are made to feel guilty over their choices, whatever they are.

my questions were serious inquiries, not judgements.

i truly wanted to know that if there wasn't a milk bank here, then how would one ascertain the safe-ness of using someone else's milk? that is NOT being judgemental. that is asking a relevant, important question! informed choice? ok... but how do you make an informed choice if you are shot to flames for asking the question?
 
Wow Carang some strong use of capitals there. My post was not aimed at you, I hadn't even read all your posts until now, so not sure why it struck a nerve with such a dramatic reply. If you read the earlier responses you'll notice a number of "shoulds". The mother has simply asked for breastmilk donations and her whole thread was hijacked.

On a side note, I know of no one here whose goal it is to "make" someone feel guilty. Aside from the fact we are all responsible for our own choices and feelings, what benefit is it to any one of us here to have someone we don't even know feel guilty? Doesn't make sense.

To the original poster (or anyone else who may be interested), I'm happy to post some info or PM it if you like.

All the best with whatever you decide, surely a challenging situation having a tiny preemie.

Cheers,

Lali
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Hi all,
While I appreciate all viewpoints and concerns raised and see them coming from best intentions, my post was meant for the benefit of my baby, not to open a whole can of worms. Everyone has different opinions on lots of things when it comes to raising our kids. I am an informed, well-researched, prepared-for-proper-handling Mama who just needs to reach out to those other Mamas who are "healthy, willing, and able" to help with their extra pumped breastmilk.

Just to clarify (since I hope the questions come from a point of concern not criticism) I have resorted to formula, not starving the baby, but I don't feel she is thriving on the formula as I'd hope. Apart from the obvious advantages of breastmilk, there are family diseases that BMilk would help guard against, amongst other reasons for preferring it. Ultimately, I ask for donated milk not out of guilt, but because this can be a great, healthy option for those willing to do the work for baby's welfare.
Thanks!
 
good, i'm glad you are happy with your decision. good luck. i hope you find someone who has lots of milk.

i, myself, had huge amounts of excess that ended up in down the sink. i would have been happy to donate it, but back then, i'd never heard of such a thing. (my kids are now almost 6 and almost 8).

one of the problems with online forums is that occasionally it is difficult to tell the tone of writing. i can assure you, speaking for myself, i would never criticise a mother for choosing this. it was purely out of concern and ignorance (not knowing how one would go about it).... and also that i know others who have felt a failure when breastfeeding didn't go according to plan (my sister-in-law). she felt a terrible sense of guilt, which i really didn't think was fair. it wasn't so much what she herself thought, it was what everyone else was telling her....
 
lali, i thought it was directed at me as a previous poster to you had quoted my response. sorry if it wasn't. as for my use of capitals... it was only for emphasis (and it was only one word) certainly not meant to be rude or yelling. sorry if it was interpreted that way.
 
Hi rnih mommy, do you have enough supply for your lil one now? I'm a SAHM and have been breastfeeding my 4mo LO directly, do let me know if you need extra breast milk. I can try to pump and establish if i have enough supply, won't be lot...but certainly can spare bout 4-5oz a day. So far, i've only been pumping during weekends as its not very convenient to nurse my baby when we are out. Do drop me a PM if you need extra bm. All the best and don't give up on bfeeding, like you i strongly believe its the best for our LO!
 
Hi rnih, i am exclusively pumping and have quite a bit of june/july stock piling up in our tiny freezer. Do you still need extra BM?
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