International Montessori in Ap Lei Chau - DESPERATE

C

cheekster

New member
My 2 yr old boy has just joined the Toddler Group at the IMS in Ap Lei Chau, both him and I were very overwhelmed on this 1st day of school. I was surprised at all the rules & how strictly they were enforced in a toddler group for 2 - 3 yr olds. Like they were supposed to push their chairs back when they leave their tables, my son did that with one hand instead of two, the teacher just wouldn't let it go and made him do it over & over again until he got really frustrated. The reason I didn't want to send him to a local pre-school or kindy is because I'd like him to be given the freedom to develop his own character and self and not be told that there's only one way to do things and stifle his imagination. That's why I sent him to a Montessori school because I heard about how much they respected each child and how they're allowed to choose what they like to do, now I'm worried that I've made a wrong choice with all these rules & how things can only be done THEIR way.

I'm desperate to hear from any parents who have sent their children to IMS HK for a longer period that it does work out better in the long run, and there is hope for a happy & creative child under the Montessori method. Much appreciated.
 
No matter what reassurances you might receive from other parents, the happiness of your child is the most important thing. If you feel that he is not adjusting and not happy after a reasonable period (as it always takes little ones sometime to adjust), then you should consider finding another playgroup.

A friend of mine had exactly the same experience as you did last year and she withdrew her little boy as she felt that he was not adjusting well and not happy at IMS as it was too rigid for his personality.
 
Thanks Portia, I think you're absolutely right, perhaps it is too early to judge, hopefully I won't have to pull him out after he's tried so hard to adjust. Every change just cause so much stress for someone so little. Thanks again.
 
Wishing you all the best Cheekster! My LO just started playgroup at another school as well and cried a lot at the first session. I am hoping he'll adjust fairly quickly but will see how he's doing at the end of the month.
 
Dear Cheekster
I'm sure the first day of school is very overwhelming for both mother and child. I am not too sure how much research you have done on the Montessori philosophy and methodology but I would like to try and put your mind at ease as to whether you feel you have made the right choice by sending your son to a Montessori School.
Firstly, I cannot emphasis just how much your son will be respected and loved by the toddler teachers at IMS. Secondly, it is very important to understand that the reason behind showing the children what to do in a specific way is so that the children learn the ground rules that are in place in the classroom. Many believe that the concept behind Montessori is that children are free to do whatever they want, whenever they want. This is true to a certain extent - children have the freedom to choose their activities and move around the classroom but this should be done in a disciplined manner so that the classroom is a calm place to work in. Otherwise it could be quite chaotic!
Showing the children how to tuck their chairs under the table, or how to roll up a mat, or how to carry a tray with two hands is to help children understand the rules of the classroom. Children learn best by repetition and being shown how to do something again and again. I am sure that your son did get a bit frustrated but I am sure that the teacher was only trying to help.
One of the goals in a Montessori classroom is to encourage children to become independent individuals. They cannot do this unless they are guided in the right direction. This takes time and patience.
Please don't feel you have made the wrong choice of schools. Allow your son to develop under the guidance of the teachers. If you would like to have a better understanding of certain concepts, the best person to ask is the teacher. Never be afraid to ask why things are done in a certain way. If you understand how things work in the classroom, you can help guide your son too and be a part of the experience.
 
Toddler program at IMS

Dear Cheekster,
I am so sorry you are disappointed in your child's class at IMS.
My 22 months old daughter joined IMS in July and I have been able to see her progressing in the class very nicely but I do see what you mean saying that the classes are very structured and the teachers are very serious about the classroom rules.
Generally, as I learned, in Montessori the rules are very important as they teach the child about the order which is so important to them. Montessorians believe that the children of our kids' age are in the sensitive period of order and thrive in the environment that is organized, beautiful and child - friendly. That is why Montessori classes are all about the child. If you look around the classroom you will see all those little materials that fit just right to the little hand ? little puzzle, little sponges, little pitchers, spoons...
The kids are so determined to master the environment around them and do what they see us doing. Here they can do it without the restrictions of an adult - size home where everything is soooo big and inaccessible. But they have to be safe in there and that is why the teachers have to be serious about the rules. A little chair is still big for the child and it should be pushed with two hands to handle it properly and not to put strain on their little muscles. They are still learning about coordination of movements and it is easier for them to use both hands to support the materials than one. And it works!
It is so adorable to see how my child builds up her confidence in her ability to be independent although she is not yet 2.My daughter learned pushing her chair in and now at our home she is always doing that in her own room :) she also brings the materials back when she is done working with them and is very enthusiastic about washing her hands and teeth by herself. I am so proud seeing her putting her shoes on all be herself.
Montessori is nothing like playgroups that we are accustomed to, I know, but it concentrates on teaching children how to feel self ? sufficient from the very early stage. I am sure you saw your little one observing you and coping what you do. I have always thought that they firmly believe that they should learn from us.
So please give the class a chance and please speak to one of the teachers. They are so very friendly and helpful. Also, the Parent - Teacher Association at IMS is always ready to help and give advice so please feel free to call one of the Moms that work with PTA.
I believe you will be happy in Montessori if you learn more about it as it is really the right program for our dear little ones.
 
my daughter also went to the same group, but she was the first batch of students back in last Feb when they first started the toddler program. I had the same experience & totally agree with you. I had even worst experience than you, my daughter actually freaked out after a certain traumatic event that happened at that school. I still let her stay at Montessori, just made sure i was there everytime she was because i believed that there is a reason why they're doing it & everyone is praising how good the M method is. She spent 10mths there, throughout when i wasn't 100% satisified with how the teachers were, and how they kids were treated. (i saw a 3 yr old girl sitting bare bump (she took off her panties) on the floor in the girl's toilet, just wiggling around on the floor in the bathrm for like 5 mins!) I let my daughter stayed because of the mandarin (she was in the mandarin group).

anyway, when the time came for her to move on to kindergarten, we left. i just didn't feel safe for my daughter to b going to that school by herself. i always hear the teachers shout crossly at the children in the indoor playground, which i didn't believe was the right way to discipline children.

I believe small children should be given the freedom to safely explore within boundaries & to be disciplined in gentle ways. like i believe there are many ways to play creatively with stacking blocks & you don't always have to put the biggest block at the bottom. if you share my views, cheekster, then i highly recommend you pay a visit to highgate house at the peak. it's a waldorf school. the kids are well disciplined, very creative, atmosphere at the school is calm & no one raise there voice. they have a wesbite & you can check it out. my daughter's been there since she 13mths. she's now 3.5 yrs & flourishing.

good luck!
 
Dear All Who took the time to reply to my thread, I am truly touched by all your willingness to be so earnest & helpful. While it is too early for my to be convinced that continuing Casa is the right move for him, I am however remaining optimistic, since I am his primary caretaker, I accompany him to every class and we are both enjoying every minute, I must admit that I was too quick to jump to conclusion about the teachers, I have noticed how incredibly patient they are and I do see the upside to enforcing discipline, I was mistaken to think that they're not allowed to play creatively and use their imagination, but I have seen that that's not the case, they are however very strict about rules in the classroom which I absolutely think is necessary. I do look forward to seeing results of him being more confident & independent.

Thank you again for all your advice. JoanneK, thanks for the detailed account of your experience, I will definitely give Highgate a visit as per your suggestion.
 
Before you send your child to a Waldorf school, I URGE you to do thorough research of previous parent's experiences globally with the Waldorf method, and then Highgate House past parents. Montessori's freedom within a structured environment gives children the ability to create true discipline - the kind that comes from within, not the kind that works when an authoritarian enforces it. Waldorf is just free, so free that the children are left to their own devices for the most part of their time and suffer ultimately because they create fictitious worlds for themselves. How can you consider a method that supports children to do unpurposeful work healthy? Imagination is appropriate only after children have developed a sense of reality about things; i.e. how can you "imagine" about a tree if you have never touched a tree? Children under the age of six are only just getting to what is real. Be careful.
 
casa directress, you seem to have a misconception of waldorf education like the rest of the people who are critical of it.

Have you had more than 1 year first hand experience at a waldorf school? from my experience, the effect only shows after more than a year of being in a waldorf environment.


i never knew what difference it would do to a child to go to a waldorf school. i read a lot about it & it's comparison to the montessori method. i didn't understand why it would be beneficial when i am reading about what it is about. i didn't see the difference in my child for the first year she was at Highgate house. but 6 mths into nursery, there started to be a difference. now that she's in kindergarten (she's been at highgate for more than 2 years), she displays an obvious difference to kids who didn't attend a waldorf school. when i ask other waldorf parents, we seem to notice the same things: 3-5 yr old waldorf kids listen better, play more harmoniously together,don't break toys on purpose, and are generally more easy to discipline (maybe because they listen better). i don't know why & how they do it, but this seem to be the general observation of waldorf kids & others.

also, i've ran into several parent who've had their kids graduate from Highgate (some times i run into them at the pool, at the mall, park). We started chatting about our kids & when the parent found out that my daughter goes to Highgate, all of them said "oh, you go to Highgate. we miss it so much!"
 
I am amazed at rather aggressive critic of Waldorf education and Highgate House school specifically.

Well INDEED - ask the parents of the children that actually go there. My daughter goes to Highgate House school and I think this is the best school ever. Before putting her there, I made an extensive research, on this forum and elsewhere. I have yet to see a negative post on this forum on Highgate House School. But do search on Montessori - you will see MANY negative comments from parents that attempted to put their kids there.
 
elizaveta, seems like we're in the same boat. i do agree on the negative comments on the montessori schools in HK. I personally had experience at IMS & Woodland Montessori in Repulse Bay, both left me wondering why the fascination with the Montessori method. I always wonder, is it because these Montessori schools in HK are not run well, or it's just not the way I agree with.

But haven't said that, there are some international critics about the Waldorf method, but mostly in the US, and the UK, where Waldrof schools are still young. Europeans, especially Germans & Scandinavians, like in Denmark, Finland & Sweden, seem to agree with the Waldorf method. Probably because they have the longest experience with it, hence able to see the results of Waldorf education on children.
 
I have to say I found the first day at school at IMS in Ap Lei Chau, confusing and I had no idea what was going on. (my girls were 18 months old)
Luckily another mum there advised me on what the children should be doing, how I should step back etc. and yes the first couple of weeks was me, learning the Montessori way (and yes I got into a bad mood sometimes cause I didn't 'see' the point) but now 7 months later my daughters DEMAND to go to IMS every day (even Sundays hahaa)! They also attend Baby Buddies (finishing this month), My Gym, Socatots and love IMS over all these other ones!

I've noticed that they concentrate more, they have different preferences and 'work' on different things. Their Mandarin is amazing (only cause I dont know what they are saying hahahaha).

So the only two criticism I'd give IMS is that they should prepare the parents more for the way of "Montessori" and cheaper tuition fees lol

Both my hubby and I are delighted with their progress otherwise. And I'm a much more relaxed mum when I'm there :)
 
I have seen quite a number of messages detailing how the teachers would shout at the kids at playground in IMS. I have read in another thread how even school staff (in charge?) shout at other staff.

I always think our problem of rigid montessori will end if we have an AMS school...
 
I have never heard a teacher shout at any of the students at IMS in South Horizon or Morrison Hill nor the staff shout at each other...
Maybe someone is confused?

Montessori is RIGID?!??! hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha That's funny!!
 
Hi, somebodyfamous,
Glad to see that your child enjoy the life in IMS.
I little girl who has just enrolled in the toddler class (19 months) in mid-April. She cried sometimes and even today cried more once the teacher approaches and not interested in the environment at all. How can I help my child to get involved?
 
Isn't it so tough when your child cries and cries? But of course a new environment a lot of children cry, I felt terrible when I had to be seperated from my children too. Are they allowing you to sit in the classroom with your child the first week? If not, request it, I find they will listen to parents and allow it.

Also I stopped taking my children to the class cause it was upsetting ME and upsetting THEM and instead asked my helpers to take.

Actually i have a long winded word document of these instructions to my helper to help ease my girls into attending class by themselves, pm me with your email address and i'll pass to you....
 
anybody is sending their child to IMS primary? My daughter is happily enrolled at another montessori centre (so caring and warm). I am considering my options for primary school. Although there are reasons to deter me from considering IMS kinder (see my other posts), since IMS offers the ONLY choice in primary, i am still interested. can someone share their experience?
 
somebodyfamous, AMI vs. AMS - my parent class instructor is AMS. There is only ONE AMS montessori in HK. All other centres and schools are AMI (including the one my daughter attends). After doing a 90-hour class in montessori, I have strong feelings about AMI vs. AMS. AMI is indeed, MORE rigid than AMS - even the way they train their teachers! Potential AMI teachers are asked to COPY notes by hand because A. they are supposed to remember it better and B. that was the way Maria Montessori did (since there were not printers and computers back then). I have seen my instructors' notes from her school days - you would think it is crazy in this day and age.
 
I have no opinion on that to be honest.

I agree that writing something by hand, you do remember better than typing on the computer though!

We plan to keep them going to IMS till they can go as old as possible. We think in 8 years time, hopefully there will be a great solution for the secondary years OR we wont be here.....
 
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