Hopeless, still holding my son to sleep at 14 months

adahc, you are not alone! My daughter is 13 months old and I still nurse her to sleep for naps and bed time. She cosleeps with us, so she also wakes up during the night for a comfort suck. She is a happy, active little girl during the day and we nap together so I can also get some rest!

If YOU feel that you want or need to change how you put your baby to sleep, then it is time for a change. Don't let the criticism of others in your life make such an important decision for you. I often refer to www.askdrsears.com for advice.

If YOU want to continue walking your son to sleep each night and feel you need some support, please pm me. It's just nice to touch base with others to know you are not alone.

Take care of yourself.

Lisa
 
Adhac, do you have a helper? Or any family/ close friends living in HK? Perhaps if your son will spend more time with other people regularly he will begin to trust them and be comfortable with them alone anytime of the day. Be there next to him for the first few times and slowly increase distance over a few days.
Having said that many kids only want mommy before sleeping. But give it a try, even ask your husband to spend quality time with your son in the morning/ evening and on weekends. Perhaps ask your husband to make your son nap during daytime, while you rest or go for a relaxing walk etc etc.
 
fennho said:
Andrea
We are talking about going to sleep by themselves, not sleeping thru the night, it IS VERY normal for a 4yr old kid to wakeup in the middle of the night to look for parents. 4yr is still very young!
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Sorry if you thought I was defensive, but I do note that that particular message was meant just for me. The capital "VERY" just sounded to me that you assumed that I was unreasonable/uninformed on the subject. As I was not asked about further facts (ie was she having nightmares? etc), it just seemed to me that you weren't particularly interested to know and have made up your mind already. Obviously if I was wrong, I apologise.

As for "tracking" your posts, I don't need to nor want to, I have been participating in this forum for a while and it can't be surprising that I read the posts, so I remember members' comments, especially those who write often. I do have better use of my time than to stalk you!

Anyway, to get back to point, I felt Adahc was not happy about the situation she was in and was just offering my piece of advice. I was just speaking from what I learnt from my children. I had a great need to sleep train my older one, not because I needed to go out, but cos sitting on the floor 4-5 months pregnant patting her to sleep for 45 mins at a time was beginning not to be an option.

I know lots of parents have the same problems, I did. Looking back now, I feel it was the best thing I did for my children and myself, not that I felt so during the training. If parents are happy with the arrangement they have, then I think it's great, but if they are not like Adahc, it's better to find ways to improve it sooner rather than later, cos a lot of times, the longer children to get accustomed to something, the harder it is to change it.

Also sometimes when something seems harsh and unacceptable may turn out to be fine. CIO is definitely not for everyone, you should have seen my husband, could almost hear his heart crack, I just want to say that it's also not something so horrendous that you rule it out completely. I asked him last night and he said that seeing how both our daughters sleep so well, it was worth it. Just my 2 cents.
 
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