Helper while away

T

Trying

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Just wondering whether anyone's got any thoughts on the following situation:

We have a full-time live-in helper. Later this year I plan on going home for a couple of months with the children. Hubby will be with us for part of the time and in HK for the other weeks.

What do you do with your helpers while you are away? My hubby isn't too fussed about having the helper around when he's here as he'll be working and can do his own laundry etc so I was thinking about giving her a holiday. I have to admit that I'm rather nervous of leaving her alone in the flat for an extended period of time. Google also threw up a Singaporean website where people seemed to be advising to never leave a helper in the house alone with the husband as they may be false accusations of harassment made - which had never even crossed my mind as a possibility but now has totally freaked me out...
 
You can give her those two months of holidays, and offer (ask) her to go back to her place of origin. Of course, if this was not in her plans, you would need to pay for her ticket, as it is an expense she was not going to have, and very likely her two months of salary even if she is not actually working, as she did not ask for all that period of time.
Or provide accommodation in HK for her and have her come to your place a few hours every day or whatever you decide, but I am not sure that is legal.
 
How can you have someone live in your house if you don't trust them? I have had friends leave their helpers behind and have never heard of anyone being accused of that.
Singapore forums are a nightmare for helper advice, people there generally treat their helpers like lesser beings.
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of course you would have to pay her, even if she is in her home country. it is not her fault you are going away!

you have a few choices:
1) give her a completely paid holiday in her home country
2) give her a list of "spring cleaning" type chores for her to do when she is staying in your home. she can still keep up with hubby's laundry etc.
3) give her a shorter holiday in her home country: ie) have her stay here after you've left for a few days to tidy up and sort stuff out, then she can go home but she returns a few days before you return in order to open up the house, clean up (get rid of the mold that is bound to grow) etc.

the problem with her staying out while you are away is that if her boarding house is raided, it may be difficult for her to prove that she is not living there....
 
My friend's helper was idle during the time my friend was away on a long holiday and ended up borrowing money from banks/lending firms. My friend had to face many problems on her return and eventually terminate her.
 
I've left my helper in our house while we've been away before, although my husband was also with me. Once, we went back for six weeks, another time it was just for nearly three. Both times, I asked her if she wanted to go back to the Philippines, when we went back for six weeks, she spent one week in the Philippines (she didn't want to go for longer than that). The other time we went back, she said she'd prefer to stay in HK. I trust her in our house, so to me, I don't mind if she's here or in the Philippines - it's up to her. At Christmas time when we went back, I asked her whether she would prefer cash or for us to pay for her to go back and she preferred cash and not going back. When we went away for six weeks, I did give her a list of some chores to do (wash the curtains, clean under the beds etc) but I think she would do many of those things even without me specifically asking. I don't think it's legal to get her to stay in a boarding house - you could ask her to go back to the Philippines, but would have to pay her costs and wages for that time as well. Also, if you don't pay her a food allowance, when you are away you do need to still provide her food costs as well.
 
gpjapan said:
My friend's helper was idle during the time my friend was away on a long holiday and ended up borrowing money from banks/lending firms. My friend had to face many problems on her return and eventually terminate her.
Click to expand...

This would have happened even if your friend hadn't gone away - or did she go away and not pay her helper?
 
Won't panic too much, if you dont trust her, you won't keep her...that's my position at least, doesn't matter if you're at home or not, you got to trust the person that works for you. What I'd do in your position is offer her holiday when your whole family is away and have her come back when your husband will be around so she can do his cleaning. If she doesn't want to go, then I'd just pay her basic salary and food allowance..that's it. I'd pay for the expense of traveling to her home country.
 
we left our helper with hubby for some time last yr, while my son and i went back home. i didnt have a list of chores for her, except to please keep my home clean. she did everything else. thorough spring cleaning, cleaning the fridge and even got the pest control guys to come in! she was with us less than 3 months then. we gave her daily allowance and she managed her own time. she was free to do her own thing or go out, as long as the home was clean and dinner was cooked for hubby.

we came home to a very clean apartment, a very happy husband who missed us and a very happy helper dying to work cos she was bored to tears! haha!
 
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well the need for borrowing was there even when my friend was there BUT she didnt have time to go seek for it.

She left the house phone number with the lenders and my friend received harassing calls from them when her helper left.

@carang, havent u heard the proverb: an idle mind is devil's workshop!
 
when we go home for 2 months, we always send my helper home as she has 2 children of her own. she leaves a few days after me and returns a few days before our return home to clean, do grocery shopping etc.... my husband definitely prefers this as well. it's a good break for all of us. we of course pay her as well like someone mentioned above as it's not her fault we're going home. everyone comes back recharged too which i like.
 
Thing is, some helpers don't actually like going home. They get descended upon by extended family with their hands out and expected to give out presents. I think this is something you should clear at the interview, we didn't and I was surprised when my helper asked if she could stay while we were away - I'd assumed she'd snatch our hands off for a free flight home with paid vacation! For us it wasn't trust, we just thought she'd prefer to be home rather than sitting around for 2 weeks (I don't do the long summer vacation thing). It's great to come home to a clean house with stocked fridge - though the creepily arranged, colour-coordinated (and usually rearranged!) drawers and cupboards freaked me out, like something out of "Sleeping with the Enemy"!
 
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