Calling for nursing mommies who are against CIO

G

gentlemom

Registered User
Hi there

I'm new to Hong Kong and have a 15mth old baby girl. Since birth and up until now, i have always been nursing my baby to sleep for her naps and night time sleep/wakenings. We cosleep on the same bed. Recently a fellow mommy told me i'm making a BIG mistake and that this way my girl will NEVER learn how to sleep on her own.

I'm starting to wonder since i plan to wean her when she turns 2yrs old. So would really like to hear from other mommies whose babies have "been there, done that" ie nursed to sleep but now sleeping on their own. Did u all have to resort to CIO in some way or another eventually. Are there ANY babies who really DID learn to sleep on their own (AND sleep thru the night) without doing ANY form of CIO, meaning, they just do it naturally ONE DAY? And when did that happen? How did that happen?

Would be really GRATEFUL if these mommies can come forward and share ur stories...really need some encouragement now and inspiring stories....:thanks
 
listen, eventually, EVERYONE sleeps on their own.

if you are comfortable doing what you are doing, then by all means continue doing it.

if, however, you want to make a change, then there are ways to go about it. although, it will be more difficult if you wish to continue co-sleeping.
 
eventually EVERYONE sleeps on their own. there are very few 10 year olds that are still breastfeeding and co-sleeping.

if you are comfortable with what you are doing, then by all means continue doing it.

if, however, you wish to make a change, then there are ways to go about it. it may be more difficult though, if you plan on continuing to co-sleep.

good luck and have faith in yourself!
 
sorry for the virtual double post...for some reason, my first post didn't show up, so i wrote the second one only to have the first one show up afterwards....
 
I haven`t been there done that but I would say to ignore the advice of that sticky beak fellow mother. Or perhaps point out some `big mistakes` she is doing in the rearing of her own children:)
My brother and his wife co-slept with their baby (though unintentionally, she wasn`t breastfeeding and eventually my brother had to leave the bed for a while bc of the little rambunctious sleeper). They had a lot of difficulty trying to get her to sleep on her own and eventually gave up, as the girl used to cry so hard she would throw up (in the bed of course). But now she is 2y9m and since they moved house 6 months ago and got a `big girl` bed, she no longer sleeps with mom and dad.
I say do what comes naturally and instinctively for your baby. You know your situation best. And I`m sure your little girl is a very happy child. It sounds like you`re doing a great and loving job.
 
we cosleep from birth, breastfeed until they self-wean and have had NO problems, literally, moving into their own beds. My eldest took 5 days to get used to her big bed by herself, and came in around 4 or 5am for the last 2-3 hours sleep and cuddle (which we loved) - she stopped doing that around 2.5 years and stayed in bed. Our youngest took 2 days to get used to her big bed and doesn't come in at all until she wakes at 7am and has a big cuddle with us for half an hour before we all get up.

No problems whatsoever sleeping by themselves. I admit I thought it would be slightly harder than it was too so was thrilled at how easy it was. I think its slightly strange that people think you need to "learn" how to sleep...sure they have to get used to a different way of sleeping but not how to sleep.

That all being said, I think all people, not just children, are different. Some people need more sleep than others, some like to cuddle to sleep, some like to be left alone...its all different, however I hope I have given you some hope.

The mother who gave you that advice is probably only projecting her own feelings to be honest - I have friends who barely hide the horror from their faces when they know that we cosleep from day one until they self-wean...lol...but honestly my husband and I just loved it! There were so many wonderful memories that we wouldn't have had if they had have been in cots, little hand holds in the middle of the night, listening to their happy little dreams etc. but I do understand how some people just like their own bed for themselves too! lol
 
oh sorry meant to add, not sure what CIO is, but if that means leaving them to cry by themselves - no, we didn't do that. in those few days that they were getting used to being in their own room and own beds, they would of course get out of bed, come and find me and then I would comfort them and return them to their own beds, stay with them for a little cuddle, kiss goodnight and leave and just kept repeating that. from what i can recall it took around 40 minutes the first night, 30 the second, 20 minutes the third etc until nothing with our eldest and like i said, our youngest kind of just accepted it straight away but for those few days we just did the same thing.
 
i co sleep and nurse my bb at night. when my mil started babysitting her when she was 6 months old, she just let her sleep in the baby cot in the afternoon. and nowadays, during the weekend, she would sleep in the baby cot in the afternoon.. and co sleep with me at night. u may try to put some soft toys in her cot. i have some really light toys accompanying her during the day. she seems to like the soft toy touching her face,,. it's like when i nurse her at night, and her face leaning against my breast.. . also a blanket at the end of the cost.. so she can kick it.. and feel secure.

don't worry, about making 'mistake'.. enjoy her sleeping with you.. stroking and smelling her..
 
btw, when the babies finally sleep on their own, maybe it's the mothers that have problem adapting to it.. :)
 
I nursed my 3 year old daughter for 12 months and we co-sleep with her..still. When I weaned her from the breast, I was worried that she wouldn't be able to sleep without nursing, but she totally surprised me and was able to sleep on her own. I gave her the same bedtime routine minus the breast and with that she knew it was bedtime and fell asleep.
So, really enjoy sleeping with your little one and nursing her, don't worry too much about what other people say, I was also given many unwanted comments, but I did what worked for us and my daughter and she's a happy sleeper.
I know when we move her into her big girl bed next month, it will not be a problem either. (We've been getting her excited about her new "princess themed" bedroom)
HTH

Theresa
 
yikes, i would think its the opposite, reei. Co-sleeping was hard work- I never slept those 3 months. I would wake up with every sound and so worried about my husband turning over on the baby. and then i transfered the baby to his own cot and room, HE (the baby) slept better! I felt a bit indignant!!:)
 
I have a 15mnth old son, we bed-share and he nurses like a newborn (all the time LOL!).

Just recently, I'd say over the last month or so, he has been sleeping a lot better. At least twice a week he will STTN (6hrs or so in one stretch). I didn't think it would ever happen but he is learning to sleep longer. I have not initiated any changes; no night weaning or sleep training etc.

Your daughter will learn to sleep by herself. For now just enjoy her being little and ignore ppl who don't know what they're talking about. :smile:

I agree with reei, I think it will be tougher on me than on my son! I love co-sleeping and snuggling with him!
 
forget the sounds they make....

my two kids talk in their sleep, sing in their sleep and recite nursery rhymes....

they also thrash around and my son has even done scissor kicks with his legs at night....

a good night's sleep for mummy co-sleeping... ummmm.... i don't think so! (but then again, mine are older... 2 & 4)
 
Thanks for starting this thread, gentlemom! My DD is almost 15 months old and, like you, I nurse her to sleep and we co-sleep. Does your little one wake often during the night? Some nights are better than others for us, but sometimes she wakes me quite often for a comfort suck back to sleep! I don't worry about what other people say because I see how well the arrangement is working for our daughter! I also know I wouldn't sleep very well if she was in a separate room or bed...

mumto2, how old were your children when they self-weaned? How far apart in age are your children? We are expecting our second child in November and I wonder if I need to do anything to prepare our little girl for the arrival, especially if she is still nursing. I don't want my stay in hospital to be traumatic for her. Right now, nursing provides her with so much comfort and security that I worry about how she will be while I am away!
 
freddiebiscuit said:
Thanks for starting this thread, gentlemom! My DD is almost 15 months old and, like you, I nurse her to sleep and we co-sleep. Does your little one wake often during the night? Some nights are better than others for us, but sometimes she wakes me quite often for a comfort suck back to sleep! I don't worry about what other people say because I see how well the arrangement is working for our daughter! I also know I wouldn't sleep very well if she was in a separate room or bed...

mumto2, how old were your children when they self-weaned? How far apart in age are your children? We are expecting our second child in November and I wonder if I need to do anything to prepare our little girl for the arrival, especially if she is still nursing. I don't want my stay in hospital to be traumatic for her. Right now, nursing provides her with so much comfort and security that I worry about how she will be while I am away!
Click to expand...

Yeah thanks gentlemum, it's nice to 'meet' some others who are in a similar situation!

Freddie, can I ask a personal q- when did you get ppaf back? I'm just curious because I've read that co-sleeping and night-nursing can delay ppaf. I'm 15mnths pp and still no AF.

I know I wouldn't sleep well if DS were in another room. I don't think I could cope at work if I had to get up 4-5x a night. Much easier to roll over and boob DS!
 
My daughter is going to be 14 mnths soon and I co-sleep with her. She nurses 1- 2 times in the night just for comfort and loves to cuddle with me at night or keep her leg or arm on me. I love the closeness we share while sleeping and breastfeeding. She is becoming a better sleeper on her own because there are nights when she sleeps through entirely or for 8 hours straight. I think she now nurses just to get close to me :)) I am not ready to make her sleep alone or stop nursing and when it happens I will miss it more than she will. Enjoy it while you can, this time is less than 2% of your entire lifetime.
Koan I got my PPAF when my baby was 8 months old and very regular ever since.
 
Last edited:
HMM... i am enjoying it.. but how is your hubby coping with this? my hubby hopes that i'd put bb in the cot,, yet , can't stand it when she cries so much..
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top