Any local customs after giving birth?

N

Newbie_hk

Registered User
Are there any local customs to observe once you've had a baby?

My husband noticed that a colleague at work treated the entire department (staff of 20) to lunch when his wife gave birth. Is this customary or was this just an enthusiastic father who was just happy to treat his co-workers?

I will give birth in a few days so my hubby was wondering what's the local practice here. We're happy to go by what's customary as we think it's nice to do something that's done by the locals.

Being an Irish/Australian/Filipino couple, we don't do anything special except send birth announcement cards home.
 
There are a lot of superstitions regarding eating bananas, washing hair and similar.
There is also the interesting custom of Confinement but I'm not aware of buying lunches/dinners/cigars and similar.

HC
 
Traditionally, you are to host one party at 30 days and another at 100 days. The protocol is similar to a Chinese wedding or any other sort of banquet -- you pay the bill for the meal, but people usually give laisee or gifts back.
In our family, the 30-day meal is for immediate family -- just the baby's parents, aunts, uncles and grandparents. The 100-day one is bigger and includes extended family.
Socially, it is probably not expected for an Irish/Australian/Filipino couple. You can do it if you like, but I doubt people would consider it an obligation for you. And even some Chinese couples are cutting back on what is a big expense.
 
I believe this is called a red egg party or red egg and ginger party. It's a way of announcing the baby.

After I gave birth, my husband's work actually gave him laisee, his colleagues gave gifts and our local friends gave gifts and brought a Chinese soup that promotes milk production - we didn't have a party.
 
normally within the first couple months the new parents will make "ginger, egg and pigs knuckle" in black vinegar to pass to friends / family. and then there will be a banquet for the baby at 100 days (OR for some at 1 mth) - it's normally either or now. if the occasion(s) is for family only, then the new parents will normally treat their colleagues to lunch...because normally his/her colleagues will give gifts to the new born and it is a way to repay the generosity and to thank everyone for their generosity.
 
my mother says she's supposed to bathe me in ginger water after giving birth. i've never heard of this before!!!
 
evgreen said:
my mother says she's supposed to bathe me in ginger water after giving birth. i've never heard of this before!!!
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I have heard of it and in fact MIL "force" me to use those ginger water when I want to take a shower after back from hospital.
 
the ginger is supposed to take the excess "air" out of your body so that you will not develop rhematism when you get older. they actually charged $1000 for ginger water at Matilda (which for me was ridiculous!) and to make matters worse for my MIL I took a shower - washed my hair and all 3 hours after the birth! you're not meant to wash your hair for a month - for the same reason!
 
@lesiefu

I am surprise that Maltida such an expat popular hospital have ginger water and so expensive too.

I also did something that dismay my ILs. They said my hand can't touch/contact with any unboiled water. Well, that means I can't wash my hands after going to washroom? :p LOL
 
wow i had no idea matilda would offer something like that (and so expensive too)... to my knowledge all you do is boil ginger in water and add it to the bath. i'm definitely going to wash my hair afterward though...and take a good long HOT shower!
 
my mother made me use ginger water too, but i couldn't stand the smell so i 'washed' it off although i did use it.

we did the 100 day party (plus or minus a few days, can't recall exactly) but didn't do the red eggs... or i think my MIL did.
 
Many of the confinement rules date to a time when China had no clean, running hot water, or indoor heating.
That's why women couldn't touch unboiled water -- because they might pick-up water-borne diseases like dysentary. And why they couldn't bathe or wash their hair -- because in those days, a cold could lead to pneumonia or bronchitis, and there were no antibiotics. It was when there was high mortality rates for new mothers.
As a Chinese person myself, I have to say that it's all incredibly outdated and I won't be allowing any of it! Thank God we now have modern showers, hygiene and temperature control.
Ask anyone if they can prove that these Chinese things work scientifically, and they won't be able to.
 
Gracey said:
Ask anyone if they can prove that these Chinese things work scientifically, and they won't be able to.
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I can tell you about confinement foods from a scientific view point.

Nearly all confinement foods the world over have two things in common. They are either high in iron or high in calcium, often both. And guess what the two minerals it is most common for a new mother to be deficient in? That’s right, iron and calcium.

The ginger vinegar, mentioned earlier, is a prime example of this. It is very high in both iron and calcium. And it is known in the Chinese community to be very good for women’s health, whatever their age. This is why when a new mother is given the ginger vinegar, usually by her mother or mother-in-law, she gets more than she could possibly eat by herself and so she shares it with all the other females in her life.

Best wishes,
SARAH

Sarah Hung IBCLC
www.lotuslactation.com
 
Sarah's right. There are of course some benefits that are shared by all confinement foods around the world. And most of it is common sense, like eating a nutritious diet with plenty of iron and calcium, resting for a month, or having help around the house when you have a newborn.
Personally, I've been eating ginger like mad -- so there is a part of me that is still traditional. :)
But being part of a Chinese community, I can tell you that there is also much superstition. I've heard it all, from the placement of the bed, to the use of knives, to cutting your hair so it doesn't sap the baby of nutrients, to all sorts of things. Not bathing for a month just seems like a very bad idea in modern times, or wrapping a new mother in suffocating hats and blankets in a Hong Kong summer. Every time I hear someone say that women can never have a drink of cold water, or eat a slice of watermelon, it drives me crazy. Because when I ask the reason, I'm just told, "That's what Chinese people do."
So use your good common sense. But do rely on your own judgment, and some scientific fact, and not just believe all the Chinese old wives tales espoused by pu-yi or grandmas!
 
And, while taking ginger in your food is one thing, I have no idea how adding ginger water to your bath will help you with iron, calcium or anything else.
 
Maybe because ginger has antiseptic qualities in ancient times, it helped. Now, with soap, don't think it's so relevant. The superstititions have some logical basis but don't see why people can't cite the logic then, instead of the superstition. Like, don't move or do renovations during pregnancy, the reason is probably that this is tiring, too much dust etc. That's kind of common sense. But I was actually told by someone in my office that if i do this, my baby might get some marks, and she really believed this had happened to her brother! I was also encouraged to drink milk to make my baby fair. Honestly, I'm Indian. I hardly think this makes sense because then all of India would have fair babies. Drinking milk again might be encouraged because of calcium. So why not say - drink milk it's good for calcium instead of the ridiculous 'make your baby fair'. Oh if I followed all the strictures between India and China about what fruits not to eat, I would be eating no fruits at all.
 
charade said:
if I followed all the strictures between India and China about what fruits not to eat, I would be eating no fruits at all.
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LOL Reminds me what my MIL try to do to my fruits. According to her, I can't take anything cold and to her fruits are cold and she said if you want to eat it your must warm it up by putting it in a bowl of warm water for a couple of minutes!
 
My sister-in-law and I were laughing at this. We're both Chinese, but also conscientious and educated, and read up on both Western and Chinese rules. What was funny is that they are often in total conflict. U.S. sources say that watermelon is a refreshing way to deal with nausea and a good source of Vitamin C. The Chinese say not to eat it -- but for no reason other than that old "cooling" superstition.

This conversation led to some aunties argue whether the rule applies to all melons, bittermelon, watermelon, or what. Seriously, they can't even get their own rules straight. And the rules are different between, say, Southern and Northern Chinese -- which goes to show that the whole "Chinese women are built different" argument is just bosh!

We're all joking here -- but the reality is that if an expectant mom takes this too seriously, she could be cutting out essential fruits and vegetables from her diet. I find it hard enough eating well -- while working full-time -- while ignoring all these superstitions. What if you believed the old wives tales and were not eating bananas, melons, cool water, lychee, mangos, healthy smoothies, or anything?

When I'm at work, I'm happy if i can find a good fruit salad instead of junk food. Thank God I can think on my own and eat it without worrying.

P.S. One Chinese lady told me that if I drank cold water, my child would shiver uncontrollably in life. I replied that, if that was true, the whole Western hemisphere would be shivering all the time!
 
yeah my Chinese colleagues keep insisting on the ginger bathing thing- they explained it would help to remove the wind from my body after giving birth. I asked how the wind gets inside in the first place- will it be extra windy in the delivery room while I push? And I don't much like the idea of passing the wind suddenly later either! :)
 
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