Adoption

[Pooky]

Hi,

I've written this before, but with little luck.

We are adopting and would love to hear from anyone who has adopted or knows anyone who has adopted from HK .
How long did you wait? How old was your child? How did they settle into your home?

The agencies paint a negative picture in terms of wait times and the children's needs, but through friends I have heard of successful adoptions, but don't personally know anyone to actually ask/speak to about their experience.

Thanks

 

[astonvilla]

Hi Pooky. To add to my PM, we did a tonne of research about attachment and reactive attachment disorder pre-placement.

We implemented a lot of techniques the pros suggest for adopted children - e.g. we chose one parent (my wife) to meet all the needs (e.g. feeding, washing, playing etc) of our daughter for the first 3/4 months. Whilst it was very difficult for me to wait to form a strong attachment in the early stages, it was key for our daughter to be able to securely attach to one parent, before attaching to the other.

After that 3/4 months it was my turn and, these days, we are co-conspirators against my wife. We're always monkeying about and we have a very secure attachment and a lovely relationship as parents to our daughter.

Adoption is a difficult process at the best of times but I think you have to approach it with your eyes open and with a lot of patience and humour. It is for sure the most satisfying thing I have ever done. I am immensely proud of my daughter's happiness, and I love seeing her personality grow and grow as she develops.