Hi, I also have a 3 month old. U must be tired if the baby is only going to bed at 4am! I never had a routine for the first 6 weeks as my bub had problems with reflux so she was really difficult to settle. In the end I was so exhausted that I got a maternity nurse to stay with us for 48 hours and she gave our girl some tough love to get her into a routine! We have not looked back. It takes a couple of weeks but it's worth it. She still struggles getting herself to sleep during the day and we have to pat her to sleep and she cries! I'm trying to wean her off this and to try and settle herself! But at night we put her down at around 6.30pm she's normally exhausted, wake/feed her at 11ish and then she normally sleeps til around 6.30am. One piece of advice I was given was to start every day at 7.00am no matter what sort of night/amount of sleep she has had. Also to give her a bath at the same time so that she knows it's bath, bottle and bed! Honestly I really didn't think I could get my little one into routine at night but it was easier than I thought. During the day she's still not quite there!!! I would love to hear from other mums who can advice how to get our lady to put herself to sleep for her daytime sleeps. We have blacked out the room but she hates going in the cot during the day!