2 year old unaccompanied - too young?

S

starbucks2

Registered User
Hi

My son is almost 2 years and 2 months. I am considering playgroup options and in particular whether he would cope with unaccompanied classes when he is 2.5 years. He has been to Baby Buddies in Sheung Wan (accompanied) which was good but we are now in DB and the accompanied options are limited. He is in an accompanied one once a week at the moment. Does anyone else feel that kids are too little at this age to be left in an unaccompanied playgroup? Maybe it is just my son, but can't imagine he'd like being left there. I am sure they all cry to start with but just wanting some opinions on when people started unaccompanied playgroups.

Thanks
SB2
 
We were same could not send our son alone to school so early so we delayed and he went at 2.9. I personally feel girls are better equipped to go early
 
We are in DB too and my little girl started unaccompanied at 20 months. My friends little boy has just started the same playgroup this week at 23 months. His first morning alone was yesterday and he was fine.
There is a big difference between playgroups and I would recommend you take trial classes or at least look around quite a few first.
Also if you are in DB it may be worthwhile trying Second Friends at the marina club. It is in a huge area so your son can get used to going off and playing without you being quite so close by. It really does help with the independence.
 
My son is 2.5 months and will start unaccompanied next month... I think I AM the one not to be ready ;). I know my son will be fine, as for example he is able to put/undo his shoes alone, wash his hands, eat his snack and pour his water alone, but on all, he seems to get bored now in the same classroom, and needs something more challenging.
I'll put him unaccompanied only 2 times a week first.
 
My little girl would have to go unaccompanied from July, she will be 2 years and 4 months old then. I am so not ready for it, as I fear she will be very confused and upset, perhaps cry a lot too. Gosh!!! it makes me cry right now thinking about it. She dislikes going with the Helper at this point in time and tells me to come along too. How will she cope alone?
Perhaps it depends on the individual child, some take it well others don't. Also I think if the child has been going accompanied to the same school, has been with the same teacher and has friends/ class mates he knows well, then its little easier.
 
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Thanks everyone.

Shoni - we are at Second Friends now which is good. I have signed up for a term so that we could decide whether we want to stay with accompanied or move to unaccompanied. Could you please PM me the unaccompanied one which your child goes to - would you recommend it?
 
My daughter is 25months and started going unaccompanied this week. First day she was fine, it was me that had to fight back the tears. Second day she was chatting away about what she was going to do but when we got there and I said goodbye she held my leg and cried. I rightly or wrongly gave her a hug and explained she was going to play and mummy would be back later. She let go but was still crying when I left the room which broke my heart.

However, I then sat in reception where you can watch via video what they are doing in the classroom and my daughter was busy painting and playing with another little boy. All within the 1 minute separation. I am sure my daughter would ideally like to stay with mum and some of the tears at least are her showing her disapproval, but I also think it has/is doing both of us the world of good. After 25months of solid one-on-one time with mum (we have no helper) I need it!

I dont think it is as much to do with the playgroup (presuming you have picked somewhere you think meets the needs of your child anyway) but more each individual child as to when they are ready.

And I don't think mums are ever really ready to leave their child- I dont think I was but then dont think I would be in a years time either!

Sorry for the long post it has been an emotional week and I saw this thread and wanted to off-load.
 
Thanks Nic. I agree about me not feeling ready for sure! But I also think he is not ready. He is a late talker and I wonder if that will make it harder for him. Having said that, it might help his talking more. He is very social at the park and playground and at his accompanied playgroup. Aggghh! Its such a big decision - tough job being a Mum!
 
In Singapore, it seems like everyone sends their kids right at 2 years old or even a little before to unaccompanied classes. I was not quite ready for our son this winter as I still thought he was a bit immature, but I have decided to send him this fall - he will be 33 months old.
 
We started sending my son to full-day nursery school, unaccompanied when he was 2 years, 1 month old and he did fabulous! He didn't cry and carry on like we assumed he would. He was a bit clingy for the first couple of weeks (the parents accompany the kids for the first couple of weeks to help them adjust) but now he has no problems and runs off to his class as soon as we drop him off. I think it totally depends on your child and the child's personality. My son was ready and able to go unaccompanied to school (not just a short playgroup but sometimes he's there from 9 am to 3:30 pm) at around 2-years-old. Only you, the parent, can say for sure if the time is right or not for your own child.
 
What made it easier for me and my daughter was that the teacher was the same for the accompanied and unaccompanied class (made sure we booked a slot with the same person).

I knew that it was familiar ground and that she would feel comfortable. I am less happy at the thought of the next 'phase' this September when she is 3. New school, new teacher, so feel for you.
 
Starbucks2 there is a new montessori preschool/ kindergarten opening in April in Discovery Bay this month. Might want to check it out
 
I rang the new montessori full of hope as it claims to be a bilingual montessori, but in truth the Mandarin teacher is not a qualified montessori teacher and there will only be 2 teachers to 20 children, aged 2. All children are expected to be potty trained. And the person I spoke to on the phone did not seem very organised or well informed. I asked for an email with information will keep everyone posted.

I know there is a factor in playgroups as well as the capability of the child. My friends child had a horrendous time going alone to one playgroup but was fine the following week at a different one....

PM sent
 
as someone who has taught various playgroups for almost 15 years, i can tell you:
1) the kids almost ALWAYS cry at least for the first few classes
2) the kids ALWAYS stop crying within 5 minutes of their mums leaving (in 15 yrs, there has only been one exception)
3) it's the MUMS who are not ready to leave their kids
4) the mums usually, inadvertantly cause more tears by their reactions to the child's tears (give hope that if the child cries enough, they will be taken home... mum's reacting badly so that the kid feels worse being left)
5) if you act as NIC did, and give hug, say matter of factly that you will be back in a while, see you later... the kids get over it faster once in the class room

good luck! it's a tough decision, but one only you, the mother, can make. it has to come at a time when YOU are ready otherwise it could cause more tears.

(ps> caps for emphasis not meant as shouting)
 
funny, my son is also a late talker ( think it's typical for boys)...he says 2 words together now at 26 months which i am fine with as i am not going to push him. i know he will talk when he's ready, but i actually think enrolling him in nursery earlier would have helped his communication skills......
 
In other places such as Japan, US, etc, kids go to daycare earlier (even before 1 year old), they are fine; just in HK, the earliest time seems to be around 2 yo. The kids will be taken care of (whether they can talk or not), assuming the teachers are good. I think kids can cope with it, but it's good or not for their long-term developments is up to each parent to decide.
 
My daughter went to daycare 2x a wk, 4 hrs per session, when she was just over 12 months. She cried for a few minutes for the first few times. She was fine for a few months. When she moved up a class, she started crying again but this time it went on for a few weeks. Looking back, it might be the carers who were not able to provide enough attention to the younger ones in the class. It might be the low number of adults to the number of children they cared for. So, you have to look out for the signs.

She's 28 months now and has been going to a new nursery for 3 months. She's loving it. It's a small nursery and the carers are far more attentive and ...caring.

It's really about finding a nursery that you and your child are comfortable with. And managing separation anxiety. I feel that it's good for the child to socialize with other children knowing the parent isn't around to support or back them up. It encourages independence from a young age.
 
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